Into the Darkness
by Taya8989
Summary: Rachel thought that this year was going to be different.   She hoped that the teasing and bullying would stop, but it only gets worse.  Rated M for future chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: This is my first Glee Fic. It is probably going to be a long one. Rated M for future chapters. Hope you enjoy! **

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Rachel Berry was destined to be a star; that much she knew for sure. This undeniable truth was the only thing that kept her sane most days. She had thought that having made it to Regional's, Glee Club would have been boosted in the social standing at WMHS, but she was completely incorrect. IN fact, Glee Club was considered just as lame as ever and the slushies and teasing had failed to cease. Even with Finn as her boyfriend, she was still considered an ugly freak. Although she would never admit that the teasing got to her, it had begun to wear her down. She hid it from Finn and her dads, mostly out of embarrassment, but also because she felt like there was truth in it. She hated feeling vulnerable and helpless and would rather act like the insults didn't get to her than show any weakness. Glee club was the only place she felt accepted, and even then there were moments of hostility between her and the other members. She couldn't help that she had a million ideas for ways in which the club could improve. She knew that she could be brash and came across as overbearing, but her excitement often overwhelmed her and she wanted every opportunity to showcase her talent. Her voice set her apart from everyone, it was the one thing that she felt made her special and it was valuable to Glee and therefore so was she.

It was Monday morning and Rachel woke up happy. She had spent the entire weekend with Finn, mostly watching Barbra Streisand movies, and she was so excited to be seeing him at school in a few short hours. They had really begun to connect and Rachel started to feel less needy around him. She trusted him and what they shared and was no longer afraid he was going to leave her for someone hotter or easier. Rachel wasn't stupid, she knew she wasn't the hottest girl in school and Finn would probably start getting frustrated with her if she continued to deny him reaching anything more than second base, but she just wasn't ready yet. She thought she was with Jesse and it had all been a lie, so she wanted to make sure that this time it was going to be perfect. Thinking about Finn took Rachel back to Saturday night. Saturday night was her dads regular date night, so she knew that they would have the house to themselves. She took Finn upstairs to her room with the intention of only having a major make out session, but as they were lying on her bed, Finn looked at her and said he was in love with her. He had said it before, but it seemed so honest and real this time. Of course she loved him back, but she still wasn't ready to go all the way. He started running his hands up and down the sides of her ribs and it sent shivers down her spine. She loved the way Finn touched her and kissed her and it took a lot of effort fighting the feeling of wanting to do more with him. But it ended there and they just made out for ages. It was nice, in fact it was perfect and Rachel couldn't have been happier with the evening. She had a boy that loved her and while everyone at school might hate her, she knew that she had someone who didn't.

She jumped out of bed after reminiscing about the weekend and threw on some workout clothes. She grabbed her ipod, pumped on some of her go-to work out songs and began her usual half hour session on her elliptical before racing to the shower. AS she undressed she tried to resist the urge to look in the mirror. Some days shge hated looking at her body because all she saw was imperfection. She knew she wasn't fat, but she still despised looking at herself naked. In truth, as much as she wasn't ready to go all the way with Finn, part of that feeling came from the fact that she was worried about being completely exposed to him. If she wasn't 100 per cent happy with her body, how could he be? She decided that it wouldn't hurt to skip breakfast that morning. After blow-drying her hair and putting on a little bit of makeup Rachel set about choosing an outfit for the day. Although Rachel was constantly criticised for the was she dressed, she loved her sweaters and knee high socks. It was her signature look and she wasn't about to change it. She opted for her favourite blue polka dot dress, some white knee highs and cute paten navy shoes. She grabbed her bag and checked the time. She liked getting to school early and put in some practice for Glee before any of the other kids showed up. It was 7:30 so she still had time up her sleeve. As she made her way downstairs she called out for her dads. She walked into the kitchen and found a note saying that Daddy had to go out of town to help with a surgery and Dad went into work early to get a case ready for court. He would be home late, but had left money for takeout. This wasn't unusual. Her dads were important and often busy with work. They loved her and she knew that they were around as much as they could be and she had always been an independent child, so it didn't bother her too much. It did however mean that she had no ride to school. This meant that she would have to either take the bus or walk the twenty minutes to school. She opted for walking.

The twenty minutes it took her to walk to school meant that kids had started to show up and she wouldn't be able to put in as much time as she would have liked to practice for Glee. Rachel could see that the Cheerios were on the oval running around like crazy while Coach Sylvester yelled at them and most of the football team were practicing drills. The new football coach had started mandatory before school practice sessions to get the team in shape and hopefully they might actually win a game. Rachel decided to ditch practice all together because she could see Finn out on the oval and though it might be fun to watch for a bit. She made her way to the bleachers and sat down. She pulled out some study cards for her Spanish test that morning and pretended to read them. Really she was just watching Finn. He saw her and smiled. She gave him a quick wave and her heart began to beat just a little bit faster. While she was initially threatened that Finn played football and therefore made him an eligible bachelor to most of the Cheerios, she loved going to games and cheering him on. It wasn't long before Coach Beiste told the boys to hit the showers and Finn made his way over to Rachel.

"Hey Rach, did you come to school early just to watch me practice?" Finn was smiling as he talked and Rachel couldn't help but smile back.

"Actually, I planned on doing some Glee practice, but then I saw you and thought that I could take the morning off to watch you." Rachel tactfully left out any information about her Daddy being away for who knows how long and Dad going in to work. Finn didn't really know that they were often absent parents and Rachel preferred it that way. She didn't want any questions or anyone thinking that that were bad parents.

"Well, I've gotta go shower, but I'll see you in Spanish," Finn said. He gave Rachel a quick kiss before ducking of with the other guy.

Rachel packed up her stuff and made her way to her locker. She hated that Santana's locker was virtually next to hers. Even though they were in Glee together and tolerated each other for the sake of the team, outside of practice, Santana still despised her. She still called her every name under the sun and ordered the football guys to slushy her on a regular basis. Rachel grabbed her books for Spanish and was putting on some lip gloss when Santana breezed past with Brittany.

"Britts, what do we have here? Looks like man hands is attempting to make an effort to look like a girl today," Santana remarked snidly.

Britney laughed, but didn't really get the joke.

"Santana that joke is getting really old. You need some new material," Rachel remarked quickly. She was getting sick of Santana and her stupid remarks.

"Oh Berry, big mistake. Just because you have Finn on your arm doesn't mean you can talk back to me," Santana said. You could hear the venom in her voice, but Rachel was unprepared for what happened next.

The slushy hit her from behind, soaking through her sweater immediately. Rachel could feel the icy substance quickly make its way into her underwear and it began to drip into her eyes. She turned around to be faced by Karofsky who just laughed in her face before high fiving his football buddies.

Santana stood there laughing, but Rachel could tell that Brittany felt bad for her. She hated seeing the pity in Brittany's eyes and stormed off to the bathroom admits a hallway full of laughing students. Once she was safely inside the sanctuary of the girls bathroom she began to break down. She looked at herself in the mirror and saw a stupid little girl, who thought that she could be above all of the bullying. She tried not to let it affect her but it was. She started to cry. She hadn't brought an extra set of clothes and she had her Spansih test in ten minutes. There was not enough time to get washed up and ready for class in time and she began to panic. It happened so suddenly. One minute she was looking in the mirror and chastising herself and the next she was on the floor desperately trying to breathe. The fact that she wasn't taking much air in made her freak out even more and made the situation worse. She didn't have asthma and wasn't sure what was happening. Suddenly the bathroom door swung open and she tried to steady herself to get up but couldn't make it and fell back to the ground. She felt a hand on her back and a soothing voice telling her it was going to be ok and just to breathe. She tried to calm down and soon her hazy vision began to clear. She looked up and saw that it was Kurt. He was still rubbing her back and she noticed that he had gotten his sweater wet with the slushy that was still covering her entire body. She blinked back tears and tried to stand.

"Rach, take it easy ok. Tell me what happened,' Kurt asked gently.

"I'm not sure. I got slushied and then started freaking out because I didn't have a change of clothes and I have a test first period and I just started getting really hot and couldn't breather properly." Rachel blurted out.

"It's ok sweetie, I think you just had a panic attack, but everything is going to be fine," Kurt said reassuringly.

"What? NO. I've never had a panic attack before. It must be something else," Rachel stated defiantly. She began to question herself She didn't just have a panic attack did she? No that's impossible. She had control; she wouldn't let her emotions get the better of her.

"Rachel, I'm sure I can round up some extra clothes ok. You stay here and wash yourself up. I'll be back in a minute ok. I promise you are going to be ok." With that Kurt rushed out of the bathroom and went on a mission to procure some clothes for Rachel.

Rachel started the long process of getting the slushy out of her hair. It was mostly out and she was attempting to dry it under the hand dryer when Kurt walked in with a black skirt, a pink sweater and some black knee highs.

"You don't want to know which twelve year old I had to murder for these clothes, but you will be looking back to your old self in them," Kurt said while holding out the clothes for Rachel.

Rachel smiled and took the clothes from Kurt and he helped her change. Kurt wasn't sure why this slushy attack was different from the rest and what was going on with Rachel, but he was worried. He had never seen her break down like that before and he couldn't have Glee's resident diva going over the edge.

"Rachel, are you ok?" Kurt asked after she was dressed in her new clothes.

Rachel looked into the mirror and started applying some mascara and lip-gloss.

"I'm fine Kurt. I just freaked out you know. I didn't have extra clothes and I was embarrassed and wasn't sure what I was going to do. I'm fine now though, I promise." Rachel said the last part a bit too firmly, more so to convince herself.

"Ok, well we better hurry. Class started five minutes ago." Kurt said, taking her word that she was going to be.

"Thanks for this Kurt, I know we don't always get on but this means a lot. Also, can you not tell anyone what happened? It was a once off, I'm sure of it," Rachel said pleadingly.

""Us Diva's have to stick together and don't worry this will stay between us," Kurt said. He understood what Rachel was feeling. He had been bullied enough times to know that you don't want anyone knowing that the bullying is actually getting to you.

With that they left the bathroom and Rachel raced to Spanish class and hoped that the day would just be over soon.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews and adding this story to your story alerts. I would appreciate any advice/comments, or thoughts on what you think/want to happen. Thanks guys!**

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As Rachel had hoped, the rest of the day had been uneventful. Finn had questioned her in regards to why she had been late for Spanish and she make up an excuse about getting caught up in Glee preparation and Finn had easily bought the lie. She then put on a smile and kissed him and he was none the wiser to what had truly taken place.

Rachel stood by her locker after her last class had let out. She was arranging her books and putting everything she needed for that nights homework into her bag before Glee practice. She usually met Finn around this time and they would walk to Glee together. She scanned over to his locker, which was conveniently less than three meters away, but he was yet to appear. She busied herself by looking into her star shaped mirror, strapped to the inside of her locker. She put on a little blush, hoping to make herself seem perkier than she felt.

She could see Quinn and Brittany talking by Santana's locker and hated that they always seemed so perfect. Rachel knew that they must have the same fears and worries about their bodies that she had, but they didn't have people pointing out their insecurities every day. They were friends, and they had each other. That was something that Rachel didn't have. She had Finn, but had never really experienced having a good female friend. It must be nice to have someone to go shopping with and be there for you in a way a boyfriend can't. Rachel pushed the feeling aside as she saw Finn arrive at his locker. She slammed the door to her locker and raced over to give him a hug.

'Hey Rach," Finn said warmly, pulling her towards him.

"Hey," Rachel said back, glad to have the comfort of his arms around her.

"I missed you. I know it's only been like an hour since I saw you, but I can't help it," Finn said softly into her ear.

"Me too," Rachel whispered back.

Finn let Rachel go and finished putting his things in his locker before grabbing her hand and walking to Glee together.

They took their usual seats in the front row and waited until the rest of the group showed up. Once everyone was seated Will walked in with a handful of sheet music.

"Ok guys, I have high hopes for New Directions this year as I'm sure all of you do. We are going to make it to Nationals, but first we really need to start thinking of possible song choices to WOW at sectionals. Any suggestions?" Will asked the group.

Rachel raised her hand immediately. She had a million ideas racing through her head. She got excited thinking of all the songs that would best showcase the talent of the club.

"Yes Rachel," Will said, unsurprised that Rachel would be the first to have her hand in the air. He admired her drive and creativity, but was worried that her sometimes abrasive nature could make the other students less likely to input into group discussions.

"Well, I think we should definitely do something from RENT. What about take me or leave me or seasons of love?" Rachel knew these songs were crowd pleasers and would be a great representation of the musical diversity of the club.

"How about we don't do something from a musical," Quinn said loudly.

"I'm surprised you actually know that RENT is a musical," Rachel responded, anger showing in the tone of her voice.

"Girls, this isn't something to fight over. We need to come together as a club and decide what we want to do," Will said, trying to calm the situation.

Santana was the next to speak.

"I agree with Quinn. Why don't we do something unexpected? I am sick of Broadway songs," Santana said with venom directed at Rachel.

"Well this is a Glee club Santana. Broadway songs are not going anywhere and you might as well get used to it," Rachel was indignant, what did Santana think this was? If Rachel had anything to do about it the club would sing more Broadway songs.

"OK guys, we don't have to decide anything today, let's just start thinking about it ok," Will said, determined to get the kids to focus on the rest of the lesson. "How about we start with some warm up exercises."

The kids all got up and began following Mr Schu's instructions. The rest of the lesson passed pretty quickly. Will knew that Rachel was upset, but at least she had stopped storming out of class when the others kids didn't agree with her. Still, he felt something was off with her. He decided to hold her back after practice; he still needed to talk to her about her lateness for Spanish that morning and thought perhaps he could see if everything else was ok with her.

"Ok guys, we are done for today. Good work and I will see you all again on Wednesday if not sooner in Spanish." Will paused and waited while the kids packed up. "Hey Rachel, could I speak to you for a second," Will said as nonchalantly as possible.

"Sure Mr. Schu."Rachel said with a little hesitation. She hoped that he wasn't going to give her a lecture on team spirit again. She thought his attitude towards her could often be totally unfair. Everyone usually got away with their snide comments in Glee, but when Rachel tried to defend herself or oppose their views, she always wound up getting in trouble.

Kurt was getting a lift home with Finn so they both waited with Rachel while the other kids said their goodbyes and left the classroom.

"Guys, could I talk to Rachel alone, it's just about some school work," Will said.

"It's fine guys. I'll see you tomorrow." Rachel said and leant up to kiss Finn goodbye. Kurt gave her a quick smile and the boys left.

"Rachel I didn't manage to talk to you about missing the start of Spanish class this morning. You have never once been late and I wanted to make sure everything was ok." Will could see Rachel begin to squirm a little. He could tell she was uncomfortable.

"Oh Sorry, I got caught up in the auditorium practising for Glee. It won't happen again," Rachel said and added a smile for extra effect.

Will could tell that she wasn't being honest but let it go. She was a straight A student and it was the first time she had ever been late.

"Ok, well just don't make a habit of it," Will said gently.

"I won't," Rachel said resolutely.

Will was about to let her go, but something still didn't seem right.

"Rachel, if you ever need to talk about anything, you know I'm here right." Will said, wanting to make sure that if anything was going on she knew she had someone willing to listen.

"I know, thanks Mr Schu," Rachel said and left the room. She felt a bit better. Maybe Mr. Schu didn't hate her as much as she thought.

As Rachel walked outside she silently curser herself for not asking Finn for a lift home. Glee had run late and everyone had already gone. She had forgotten that her dad wouldn't be able to pick her up and that her daddy was away.

I guess walking home it is, she thought to herself.

It was starting to get dark and Rachel didn't relish the idea of walking home under these conditions. She could have gone back inside and asked Mr Schu to give her a life, but after the ballad disaster she didn't want him to think she was crazy again.

She set of briskly, and decided that the Wicked soundtrack would soothe her during the twenty minute walk.

After a few minor freak outs of thinking someone was behind her, Rachel was safely inside her house. She went to the kitchen and saw that there was a message on the phone. She played it and was not surprised to hear that her dad telling her that he wasn't going to be coming home. He was staying at the office working on a case. He had tried calling her cell, but it was turned off. Rachel quickly dug through her bad to retrieve her cell. He was right, the battery had died.

Great another night by myself. Rachel ordered some steamed vegetables and decided that posting a myspace video would help take her mind off being alone. She logged onto her account and was surprised to find a few new comments to her videos. She was not surprised that the majority of them were negative. She quickly deleted the bad ones, knowing that most of them were from kids at school and left the remaining positive one. She read it over and over again, trying to drown out the negative ones.

"You are really great. I wish you all the success in the world and hope you become the star you dream of being."

Rachel was disappointed that no matter how much she tried the comments calling her "ugly", "fat", "man hands" and "Ru Paul", didn't disappear as quickly as she would have liked.

Rachel decided that she would skip posting another video tonight. She slammed her laptop shut and lay down on her bed. She ran through the day's events in her head. She was worried about what had happened in the bathroom. Maybe she really was turning into a freak. Rachel decided the best course of action would be to pretend it never happened and hope it wouldn't happen again. She was surprised by how nice Kurt had been to her. Sure he had experience bullying and humiliation at the hands of the popular kids at school, but hat had never really made them allies before. She thought that he had always hated her. Yes he respected her talent, but did that mean he respected her? Rachel knew that he was going through a lot. Being gay in high school couldn't be easy, and maybe she was too focused on her own dramas sometimes to understand his struggles. Whatever had transpired between the two of them, she felt that Kurt was slowly becoming a good friend. They understood each other in ways everyone else didn't.

Rachel's mind then turned over the issue of Mr Schu. She didn't want him to know the full extent of what was going on with her at school. He knew about the teasing and the slushy's, but she always put on a brave face and he thought she was strong enough to cope with it. She wanted to keep it that way. She didn't want him calling up her dads and bothering them with her issues. They were busy enough as it was and she wanted to keep the time she spent with the as happy family time; not dealing with her issues as school.

Having gone over the day, Rachel was beginning to feel a bit overwhelmed with all of her problems. She decided that she would put in an hour on the elliptical before bed and it would help her clear her hear. She took off the clothes Kurt had found for her and made a mental note to wash them before bed. She put on her runners and hopped on the elliptical in her underwear and bra. When no one was home she like working out like this. She could look into the mirror at her hideous thighs and it was like constant motivation to go harder and faster. It often made her more motivated than staring at her "Rachel Berry : Tony Winner" sign.

After finishing up on the elliptical, Rachel took her slushy drenched clothes and the clothes Kurt had found for her down to the wash. As much as she tried she was unable to get the slushy out of her cardigan and she became extremely upset. Her Daddy had bought her this on their most recent father daughter shopping trip and when she wore it, it reminded her of him. She bagged it up and put it in the trash. She hated being in this big house alone and that all she had was a stupid cardigan to remind her of having parents. This wasn't fair. This wasn't how life was meant to be for her. Shelby had rejected her at Regional's, Jessie had betrayed her, most of the kids at school hated her and now her fathers were away more often than ever. At least I have Finn, Rachel thought to herself.

Rachel dragged herself up the stairs to her room, had a quick shower and jumped into bed. Tomorrow will be better she thought to herself. It had to be.


	3. Chapter 3

It was Thursday and Rachel was happy that the week had passed without any major incidents. She had been able to have dinner with her dad last night and was happy to finally have some parental contact again. While daddy would still be away for a few more weeks, he had been calling and texting her and it made her happy. However, her dad was still leaving too early to drive her to school, so she had taken to walking. Rachel wished she was 16 so then at least she would be able to drive. It sucked relying on other people, especially when she had few to rely on.

She made her way across the deserted McKinley car park and into school. Rachel wanted to get to school extra early to practice some songs she had been working on and wanted to use to auditorium before anyone was around. She was a few feet away from her locker when she saw something had been written across it. She quickly walked faster, wanting to get to her locker as soon as possible to inspect the slander. She was met with the words 'Ugly Whore'. They were written in black marker and Rachel knew they would be difficult to remove. She stood, staring at the words, wondering who had written it and why. She fought to hold back the tears, but as soon as one escaped, she couldn't keep the rest back. She ran to the janitor's closet and got the most heavy duty cleaning products she could find. She took them back to her locker and began scrubbing. She just wanted to erase the words and make her locker clean again. She was so engrossed in scrubbing that she didn't feel the burning. She hadn't put gloves on and the bleach had started to burn her hands. Finally feeling as though her locker no longer bore the hateful words she began to notice her hands. It felt like they were on fire. She was shocked when she looked down and her hands were red and beginning to swell. She quickly put the cleaning products away and made her way to the bathroom. She put her hands under cold water and hoped that the burning sensation would go away. After about five minutes under the water, Rachel dried her hands and closely inspected them. They were still red, but they didn't hurt as much.

Great, another fantastic start to the day, Rachel thought to herself. She grabbed her things and walked to the auditorium. It was still early and no one was around, so Rachel began rehearsing. Ever since seeing her mother's rendition of Funny Girl, Rachel had been secretly practising it. Shelby's performance had been flawless. It had the emotional depth and vocal strength that she had only seen in Barbara's performance and she wanted to be as good as good as Barbara and better than Shelby. Rachel looked at her watch, she had been so caught up in rehearsing that she had lost track of time yet again. She had ten minutes before class and wanted to see Finn. The halls were busy now. Students were milling around their lockers, gossiping and discussing their plans for the weekend. Rachel saw Finn by his locker. He was so tall, that she could see him form right down the hall. She walked over to him as quickly as she could. She really needed a hug right now and he always made her feel better.

"Hey Rach," Finn said as she came towards him.

He leant down and gave her a hug before pulling back so he could kiss her.

Rachel felt warm inside. Kissing Finn made the events from the morning feel like a distant memory. He made her feel whole. She knew that relying on another person to make you feel good about yourself was a dangerous thing, but she had never felt happier that when she was with Finn and didn't mind that she was just another teenage girl head over heels with a boy.

"That was a nice way to start of the morning," Rachel said sheepishly.

"I agree. Want to head to Spanish?" Finn asked before grabbing Rachel's hand.

"Oww!" Rachel exclaimed, forgetting that her hands were still relatively sore.

"What's the matter? Did I do something?" Finn asked genuinely concerned.

Rachel quickly tried to think up a plausible lie. She didn't want to admit the truth. What would Finn think that his girlfriend's locker was a regular target for hateful insults?

"I just wash washing some clothes this morning and was using bleach. It was stupid, I forgot to put on gloves and I think it reacted with my skin a bit. It's fine though. I mean it's not serious," Rachel added quickly. Finn wasn't the smartest guy around so he didn't ask any more questions, to which Rachel was relived. He kissed her hands which made Rachel smile and then they went to Spanish together with their arms linked.

The bell rang for lunch, and Rachel was relieved. She had just sat through an hour of advanced maths and it wasn't her forte. Her dad's expected her to excel in every area of her life, so she took every advanced class she could, even though she disliked it immensely. She was looking forward to seeing Finn and actually was actually quite hungry. She walked down the halls and could see people laughing near her locker.

"You didn't really think that washing your locker would mean we wouldn't write on it again, did you?" Karofsky said smugly.

"You are so immature," Rachel said, trying to be strong.

"Well personally I think this line is better than the last," Karosky said, taunting Rachel.

Rachel got close to her locker as saw the words "Fat Pig" written across it. Everyone around her was laughing. She opened her locker and slammed her books inside. She closed it and walked through the crowd of laughing students to go and find Finn. She passed a bin and tossed her lunch in it. Today she was only going to have an apple and that would be enough. She may be ugly and annoying but she was not going to be fat.

Rachel was caught up in trying to avoid everyone that she didn't notice Santana watching her. Yes Santana picked on her and could be the biggest bitch around, but she felt that the boys were beginning to take things too far. But what could she do? She had often encouraged the bullying; she couldn't put an end to it and actually stand up for Rachel. Santana couldn't face being demoted from top dog to school trash. It was better to go along to get along and in this case she just watched Rachel throw away her food and go outside. She could tell that the bullying was beginning to wear Rachel down, but she always acted so strong and superior that sometimes she forgot that the girl had feelings.

Rachel saw Finn with Puck sitting on some benches near the basketball courts. She was surprised the two had become such good friends again after the babygate scandal, but was glad that Finn was happy. Tina and Brittany were sitting with the guys as well. Rachel made her way over to the small group and said her hellos. Finn kissed her and then got back to taking intensely to Puck about some new video game that they were both into.

"Rachel, can you believe how much homework Mr Matthews expects us to do for advanced maths by tomorrow," Tina said. She didn't dislike Rachel and they were in a lot of advanced classes together so were actually quite friendly.

"I know, it is actually quite ridiculous. He has to be one of the most out of touch teachers at this school," Rachel quipped. She really didn't like Mr Matthews and his homework load was insane.

"Agreed, if my parents didn't force me there is no way I would be taking his class," Tina lamented. Rachel nodded in sympathy. She understood the pressure Tina was under. They both had demanding parents who expected them to excel.

Kurt and Mercedes joined the group and they began discussing nationals. All the kids wanted to make it to New York and get a true taste of Broadway. They were so caught up in the excitement nobody except Kurt seemed to notice that Rachel was barely eating. As soon as the bell rang, the kids quickly, made their way back inside.

Kurt chased after Rachel and managed to find her at her locker.

"Hey is everything ok?" Kurt asked trying to mask the worry in his voice. "It's just you didn't eat much at lunch today."

Rachel was a bit taken aback that he had picked up on the fact she had only consumed an apple and quickly devised an excuse.

"Thank you for your concern Kurt, but I am fine. I wasn't feeling too well and thought that eating too much might exacerbate my stomach ache." Rachel said, hoping that would subdue any further interrogation from Kurt. She closed her locker and was again met with the words Karofsky had written.

Kurt let out a shocked breath when he saw the words on Rachel's locker. "Oh my God Rachel, who wrote on your locker?" Kurt said, quickly forgetting their previous topic of conversation.

"Just some football idiot. It's fine, the janitor is going to clean it tonight," Rachel said very matter of factly. She quickly raced off to class and told Kurt she would see him in Glee. Kurt remained at Rachel's locker, knowing that in fact it was not fine, and that sooner or later Rachel was going to have to admit that.

Glee practice passed smoothly that afternoon. Everyone was in a good mood and getting pumped for sectionals. Santana had even been nice to Rachel, which she found surprising. Rachel usually had to endure a few mean comments from her, but today everyone was too focused on perfecting their performance. Rachel was beginning to feel more accepted by everyone in Glee and Mr Schu had began to support her more, which was good.

Glee began to wind up and people started to say their goodbyes and pack up their stuff to go home. Rachel thought about asking Finn for a lift, but still didn't want him to know that her dad's were leaving her alone so much. In the end she opted against it and told him her dad was coming to get her. She had to wait behind to make sure all of the kids had left so they didn't see her walking home alone. Mr Schu was in his office and didn't mind her staying back for a bit to practice on the piano. It was fifteen minutes after the others had left, before Rachel felt it was safe to go. SHe said goodbye to Mr Schu and went to her locker to pick up some of her things. She was happy that the words had been removed and decided she wouldn't let Karofsky get the better of her. Rachel closed her locker and got out her ipod. She was feeling in the mood for RENT and was singing along quietly to _Seasons of Love_ as she made walked towards the door. Suddenly she felt a hand come down on her should. It took her by surprise and she let out a quick little squeal. She was face to face with Karofsky and she didn't know what to do. He pushed her back towards the locker and she dropped her ipod. He stood on it and she could hear it break beneath his foot.

"What do you want?" She asked trying to hide the tremor in her voice.

"I want you to stop taking back at me in front of everyone. You made me look like a pussy today and I don't like that." Karofsky said, he was mad and still had Rachel pinned against the lockers.

Rachel didn't know what to do. The attacks were usually always verbal or a slushy. No one had ever pushed her around like this before.

"Well I'm not going to stop being myself. You can't break me," Rachel said defiantly. She was mad. Who did her think he was threatening her like this.

This only angered Karofsky more. He punched her in the ribs and it took Rachel completely by surprise. She winced and grabbed at her side.

"You better smarten up Berry or this will only get worse." Karofsky said threateningly before walking away, leaving Rachel on the floor winded.

She tried to get up but her ribs were killing her and she was trying to catch her breath. She started to give in to the pain and began crying. Why every time that things were going well, did someone have to ruin them. It wasn't fair.

"Rachel?" Will called out.

Oh shit. Rachel thought. This was not what she needed right now. She grabbed her broken ipod and shoved it into her bag. She didn't know what to say and just remained curled up on the ground thinking of something to explain this away.

"Rachel what's wrong?" Will asked, panic in his voice. He was running towards her. He dropped his bag by her feet and knelt down to assess the situation. He could see that Rachel had been crying and was genuinely concerned about what had just happened.

"It's nothing Mr Schu. I just tripped and fell awkwardly. I'm ok," even in shock and pain, Rachel was surprised at her ability to make up a lie when needed. Even though it wasn't a fantastic lie it was believable and that's all she needed.

"Can you stand up?" Will asked, lending her a hand.

Rachel grabbed onto Will's arm and accepted his help. She slowly rose but grabbed her side we she tried walking.

"Rachel is that really what happened? You can't be in this much pain from tripping?" Will said, knowing that she was hiding something.

"I'm fine, I swear. You know I can be clumsy. I just fell," Rachel said, getting angry by the interrogation from her teacher.

"Ok, well is one of your dad's picking you up? I can help you out to the car," Will suggested.

Rachel's head was spinning. She couldn't walk home like this and she didn't want Mr. Schu knowing that she was going to walk home.

"Um actually my dad just texted me asking me to get a lift home with someone from Glee. He had to work late," Rachel lied, hoping to pull this one off.

"I can give you a lift. I was leaving anyway and you don't live far. Is that ok?" Will asked, hoping that his offer of help wouldn't be read into.

"Actually that would be good," Rachel replied grateful for the lift.

Will helped Rachel to the car and was trying to hide his worry. He knew that she was lying, but if she wasn't going to tell him the truth there was only so far he could push her.

Rachel hopped into the car and tried pulling the seatbelt down but winced at the pain of moving her arm above her head. She was surprised by how much damage one punch could do. She was still in shock of Karofsky actually hitting her and his threat to do worse.

"Ah Mr Schu could you help me with my seatbelt," Rachel asked, trying to hide the embarrassment.

"Sure, Rach," Will said. He leant over and pulled the seatbelt down. "I think maybe I should take you to the doctors. Just to get you checked out. I should ring one of your dad's," Will said, unsure of exactly what to do.

"No, Mr Schu please don't call them. I don't want them to worry. I'm fine." Rachel said trying to convince herself as well as her teacher.

"I can't do nothing Rachel. You are in pain and I have to inform your parents," Will was beginning to worry that Rachel was actually in more pain than she was letting on and knew that despite her protest her parents had to be called.

"Ok, fine I don't want you to get in trouble," Rachel conceded.

Will drove to the hospital and helped Rachel out of the car. He knew that she was tough girl, so for her to show pain, she must be hurt. He got her seated before going up to the nurse and collecting the paperwork that needed filling in. Will walked over to Rachel and handed her the forms.

"Can you fill these out? I'm just going to call your dad," Will said firmly, he didn't want any more protesting from Rachel.

"Sure," Rachel said, resigned to the fact that her parents were now going to get involved.

After a few calls, Rachel's dad finally picked up his phone. Will informed Hiram Berry of what had happened and that he was now with Rachel at the hospital. He was surprised that her father didn't seem overly concerned and ensured Will that Rachel had all of their health care information and would be ok on her own. He was apparently working on a big case and was unable to leave. He suggested calling their neighbour who often looked in on Rachel when he and his partner were both out of town. Will tried to hide his disapproval and said that he didn't mind waiting with Rachel. Hiram thanked him and told him to give Rachel his love and then abruptly hung up the phone.

Will walked back over to Rachel, who had filled out all of the paper work and handed it back to the nurse.

'Was my dad worried?" Rachel asked, hoping that they weren't panicked.

Will didn't know how to respond. He could see that Rachel was hoping her dad would be in the car and racing over to the hospital, but something about her expression said that she knew that wouldn't really be the case.

"He was very concerned, but he is tied up in a case at the moment so sent his love. Don't worry I'm going to stay with you," Will said reassuringly.

Rachel was dejected, she wished that her dad had been more concerned, but had known for a while now that his job was his priority. She sat in silence with Will until her name was called.

She went for an x-ray and the verdict was a hairline fracture in her 8th left rib. She was under strict instruction not to do any strenuous activity for the next two months and had a check up appointment in a month's time. The doctor filled out a form for some prescription pain killers and then quietly asked to speak to Will in the hallway.

"I am a little concerned about what exactly happened to Rachel," Dr Cohen said. He had seen lots of cases of abuse in his time and Rachel had the classic signs. It was possible she tripped, but the bruising was inconsistent with a fall.

"I found her in the hall at school. She told me she tripped, but I didn't completely buy it," Will said, with a look of worry all over his face. Despite everything, he like Rachel and wanted to get to the truth as much as the doctor.

"Well either do I. In my opinion it looks like someone may have hit her. She is refusing to change her story and with no other evidence DCHS is unlikely to want to pursue an investigation. Just look out for her. I'm not sure exactly what happened, who knows she could be telling the truth. Here is her prescription, make sure you fill it before you leave," Dr Cohen said before walking away.

Will walked back into Rachel's room. She was dressed and ready to go. Will noted how small she was looking. She really was just a high school girl, sometime he forgot that. She was very intelligent and the most driven student he had ever seen. She often appeared more like an adult than a student.

'Ok Rach, let's get you home," Will said trying to sound reassuring.

They filled the prescription on the way out and Will could tell Rachel was getting impatient. He had to help her back to the car and they drove home in silence. Will wanted to talk to Rachel about what had happened, but felt like the more he pushed her further she was going to hide. They arrived at her house and Will could tell that she was struggling to open the car door. He jumped out and opened it for her and then escorted her up to the door.

'I forgot my bag. It's still in the car," Rachel said breaking the silence.

"I'll get it, stay here," Will instructed. He raced down to the car and grabbed her bag. It was open slightly and will could see her broken ipod laying on top of her books. There was no way that Rachel would be so careless to break something like an ipod, Will thought to himself. He zipped up her bag and bought it up to her. She rummaged thought it until she found her keys and opened the front door.

"Do you need any help?" Will asked unsure of when her dad was coming home.

Rachel wanted to say no and she could have, but she felt vulnerable and wanted an adult with her.

"Um actually Mr Schu could you help me upstairs. My room is up there and I really just want to go to bed," Rachel said, feeing like an incompetent needy child.

"No problem," Will answered, shutting the door behind them.

Rachel lay her bag by the door and Will noted how immaculate her house was. It almost looked unlived in. He helped Rachel up the stairs and she directed him to her bedroom. He wasn't shocked by her room. It suited Rachel perfectly. The walls were covered in Broadway posters and there was a lot of pink.

"Thanks for all the help Mr Schu, but I'm ok now. I'm just going to have a shower and go to bed," Rachel said, hoping that he wouldn't linger to make sure she was ok.

"I'll just wait downstairs so I know you're ok. Call me when you're out of the shower ok," Will said, he wasn't going to leave until he knew that she was safe.

Rachel didn't push it. Mr Schu had been really good to her and she didn't want to get him angry by assuring him she was fine again.

"Ok, I won't be long," Rachel said and slipped into the bathroom connected to her room.

Will started to make his way out of her room, when he noticed a book by her bed laying on the ground. He knew that he should walk away, but couldn't. He was pretty sure that it was her diary, and he was worried about her. If something was going on it would be in there. He quickly retrieved the book and opened it to its latest inscription.

"I hate myself today. Everyone at school hates me. Santana called me RU Paul, Quinn said I was an ugly freak and I got slushied. I don't know how much more I can take. Even my dad's seem to be avoiding me. I haven't seen daddy in weeks and dad is always working late. I saw Shelby with Beth at the mall on the weekend and feel so rejected. God, even my own mother didn't want anything to do with me. I thought that maybe she would want to get to know me, spend time with me. Then maybe, not having my dad's around wouldn't hurt as much. But when she walked out on me all the pain I've been carrying was just amplified. I have Finn and I know he loves me, but I can't burden him with this. I don't want him to know that I have no one but him. That is unfair on him and I don't want him to feel like he is dating a bigger loser than he already is."

As will read, he got more and more upset with each sentence. He didn't know how much Rachel was going through and how much she had been hiding from everyone. He replaced the diary and walked down to the lounge room. He sat, waiting for Rachel to call out and thought that more needed to be done to stop the teasing at school and he also wanted to have a conference with her dads. Will was brought out of his thoughts by Rachel who was standing at the top of the stairs yelling out that she was alive.

Will said he would be by in the morning to pick her up for school and there was no if's or but's about it.


	4. Chapter 4

The morning drive to school with Mr Schu hadn't been as weird as Rachel initially thought. She actually felt happy that an adult was taking an interest in her life. She was nervous about going to school and seeing Karofsky, but as long as she played by his rules maybe everything would be ok. It would be hard, resisting the urge to defend herself against whatever he did and said, but she could still hold her head high and act like his actions didn't get to her. That was her only option now and it had worked for her in the past. As Mr Schu pulled up to McKinley High, he was glad to see Finn milling around nearby talking to Kurt. Since Burt Hummel and Carol Hudson had moved in together, he felt that the boys had become a lot closer. Rachel was dating Finn and was over at their place a lot, so Kurt seemed to be becoming friends with Rachel which was good. The team was coming together and really getting to know each other. Rachel thanked Mr Schu for the lift and assured him she was feeling better. She jumped out of the car as carefully as she could and went over to Finn and Kurt.

"Hey Babe," Finn said while leaning down to give his girlfriend a hug.

"Ahh, Finn not so hard," Rachel winced, and began mentally preparing herself for telling her boyfriend the lie of how she hurt herself.

"I tripped yesterday after Glee practice and fractured a rib. It's not as bad as it sounds, it just means I have to be careful physically for the next month or so," Rachel felt bad for lying, but it was easier than the truth.

"Oh My God, Rach," Kurt said, rushing to Rachel's side.

Finn looked down at Rachel, worry and concern plagued his face. He took her bag from her arm and hugged her again, gently this time.

"Rach, that sounds really serious. Are you sure you are ok to be at school?" Finn questioned. He knew his girlfriend well enough to know that even on her deathbed she would do anything not to screw up her perfect attendance.

"I assure you Finn, I am perfectly fit to be at school and with you around to carry my bag I will be fine," Rachel said, smiling at the attentiveness of her boyfriend.

The trio headed inside and the boys Rachel to her locker. Rachel wasn't surprised to see Karofsky standing by her locker with a black marker in his hand.

"Hey Berry, soon the janitors are going to give up cleaning your locker because it's always going to be written over," Karofsky said smirking at Rachel.

"Get a life Karofsky," Finn yelled, clearly annoyed by the football jocks attitude.

Rachel smiled at Finn, thanking him for standing up for her, but as Karofsky moved, Rachel saw what he had written and was unable to keep smiling; she was angry now. The words NO_ TALENT_ were there for all to see. The one thing Rachel prided herself on was her undeniable talent and she knew that she was gifted. She wanted to say something, but quickly stopped herself. Instead she opened her locker, shoved her books inside and walked to class with Finn and Kurt.

"You know he's an idiot Rachel. You are the most talented person I know, well apart from me,' Kurt said, hoping that his words would make an impact.

"Thanks Kurt, I know who I am and at least I'm not afraid to hide it. That's more than I can say for him. Nothing he can say or do will affect me and the star I am going to become," Rachel said defiantly. She may lack confidence in her appearance, but she knew that she could sing and that was something that Karofsky couldn't take away from her.

With Finn and Kurt watching over her all day, Karofsky stayed away. Rachel felt safe and the painkillers were helping dull the ache in her rib. At lunch, Rachel was surprised that everyone in Glee was sitting together at the same table. Santana, Brittany and Quinn usually always sat with the Cheerios; lately they had begun to spend more time with the kids from glee, but never all together.

Rachel was picking at her salad with Finn's arm draped around her shoulder when Kurt suggested that this Saturday the "girls" from glee should have a sleepover and volunteered his house for the Saturday night event.

"What?' Finn questioned, not too pleased with the idea. "Kurt that's my bedroom too and I don't like the idea of it being invaded by a whole bunch of girls," Finn said, trying to save his room from nail polish and girl gossip. Kurt rolled his eyes, but understood Finns apprehension.

"Well, my parents are away, we could do it at my house," Rachel volunteered, unsure as to whether anyone would actually want to come to her house.

"Berry, your parents are away? We should totally have a huge party!' Santana interjected, her mind filling up with ideas for an awesome night of booze and sex.

"No way, my parents would freak out if I did that!" Rachel added quickly, wanting to stop Santana's plans before they got off the ground.

"Look Kurt, as "fun" as a girl's sleepover at Berry's sounds, what's in it for me?" Quinn said. She still didn't really like Rachel and couldn't imagine an evening at her house would be a good way to spend a Saturday night.

"Come on it will be fun!" Kurt said, trying to get all the girls involved.

"Well I'm in," Mercedes said. She and Kurt were basically best friends and she hadn't seen a lot of him recently so a weekend of gossiping and pampering was definitely in order. "Come on Quinn, I know for a fact you can't refuse a good facial," Mercedes said trying to get Quinn involved. They had become close over the time Quinn had stayed with her and despite her bitchy demeanour Quinn could be a lot of fun.

"Ok, it's not like I really had any other plans anyway," Quinn said giving in to Mercedes.

"I'll come as long as I can bring some alcohol," Santana said. She was starting to like Rachel and kind of wanted to see what her house was like and if she was still an uptight know-it-all at home.

"Cool, me too!" added Brittany, not wanting to be left out.

"Yeah ok, it sounds like fun," Tina said, she had never really been to a sleepover and she didn't really feel like spending another Saturday with Mike and his mother.

"Ok settled, Rachel's house tomorrow at 6pm. Santana you bring the alcohol and I'll bring everything else!" Kurt said enthusiastically.

Rachel was really happy, she felt like she was making real girlfriends. This was a chance for everyone to see that she could be a lot of fun and she was determined to make it a good night.

The girls spent the rest of lunch planning things to do at the sleepover, while the boys talked about what they would do. They decided on going over to Finn's to watch the "big" football game on Burt's widescreen tv. Afterwards they had intentions of crashing the girl's party, but made sure none of the girls or Kurt heard about that.

The day wound up and class was finally over. Friday night had become Rachel and Finn's date night, so Rachel was mulling over in her head about what to wear. Finn caught her at her locker starring off into space and sneaked up behind her to kiss her.

The kiss caught her off guard and Rachel quickly whipped around with a scared look on her face.

"Sorry Babe, I didn't mean to scare you,' Finn said quickly, upset that he had caused Rachel to become frightened.

Rachel let her face relax and returned the kiss.

"That's ok, I was just thinking about our date tonight!" Rachel said, genuinely happy to get Finn all to herself tonight.

"Do you need a lift home babe?" Finn asked casually, he had seen Mr Schu give her a lift this morning but didn't question her about it. He knew that her parents weren't around as much as she made out, because whenever he came over they were never there.

"It's ok; Mr Schu asked to see me after school. I'll see you tonight ok," Rachel said before giving him another kiss.

Finn smiled and kissed her back, before leaving to go find Kurt.

Rachel stood by her locker, wondering why Mr Schu had wanted to see her. She had received a note in last period from him informing her to go by his office after class. He probably just wanted to make sure that she was ok, she thought.

She closed her locker and made her way towards the choir room. She stepping inside and could see Mr Schu and Miss Pillsbury talking intensely about something. Rachel put her bag down on one of the seats filling the choir room and knocked on Mr Schu's door. Both adults looked up and immediately stopped talking.

"Come in Rachel," Mr Schu said warmly.

"Is everything ok?" Rachel asked, concerned as to why Miss Pillsbury was present.

"Rachel sit down," Will said warmly. "I tried calling your dad's today, mostly to check that they had all the information regarding what happened yesterday but also because I wanted them to come in to talk about a few things I've noticed happening to you at school."

As Will spoke he noted how Rachel shifted uncomfortably in her seat.

"I actually was only able to get a hold of one of your dad's and he said he is going to be out of town at a medical conference for the better part of the month," Will stated.

Rachel hadn't yet heard this news. Her daddy texted her last night saying he should be home next week and now he was going to be away for nearly the entire month. She didn't react to this new information and hoped that it appeared as if she already knew this.

"He is very busy Mr Schu. You know he is the only Orthopaedic surgeon in Ohio qualified to perform bile duct surgery," Rachel said trying to reassure both teachers that her daddy's time was stretched thin.

"That may be so, but I have a few concerns over how you are coping with some of the other students treatment of you and would really like to speak to one of your dad's about it,' Will said, wanting to reassure Rachel that she was not in trouble here.

"Well dad is working on a case right now and it's taking up a lot of his time. I understand, it's very important for his career," Rachel quipped, hoping that her teacher would just drop whatever it was he was trying to do.

"High school can be a hard time Rachel, and I don't want you to feel alone. I really wanted to speak to your parents so that you have a support system if you need," Will added, trying to get through to Rachel.

Rachel was getting annoyed. Even her teachers thought she was a loser, great!

"I understand what you are saying, but I'm fine. I have the kids in glee and I know I am going to get singled out by other students because of my talent,' Rachel stated, agitation in her voice.

Will sighed; he didn't think that he was going to get through to Rachel. She was proud and stubborn and had always been self sufficient. If she needed help she would ask, he thought.

"Ok, well Miss Pillsbury is always here if you need to talk," Will added, hoping Rachel would go and see her.

"Thanks, Mr Schu, but I really have to go. I'm going out with Finn tonight and have to get ready!" Rachel said, before leaving his office and grabbing her bag.

Will was pretty sure that Rachel didn't have a lift home, but she ducked out of his office so quickly that he didn't have a chance to offer her a ride.

"Will there is only so much you can do. If Rachel isn't ok the truth will come out eventually and we can help her then," Emma said. She admired Will's dedication to the kids and despite dating Carl a piece of her heart couldn't let Will go.

"Thanks Emma. I'm just worried about her," Will lamented.

"I know, Will, but the best thing for Rachel is to know that we are here and not push her away," Emma said. She had seen a lot of kids like Rachel in her time as a school counsellor and sometimes pushing them only made them run in the opposite direction.

Rachel walked as quickly as her aching rib would allow. She wanted to get out of school and away from the conversation that had just taken place. She hated feeling as though she was losing control and that is what had just happened. Mr Schu was beginning to notice that everything was not as fine as she made it out and she couldn't have that. She was strong and independent and didn't want to rely on anyone; she didn't want to appear weak. It was a mistake in letting Mr Schu take her to the hospital and call her dads. She should have stopped him, then she wouldn't be in this mess.

Despite the ache in her side she thought that walking home would clear her head. There was still a few buses around, but she couldn't deal with the teasing that usually came from riding the school bus right now she wanted peace over the comfort of not walking.

Without her ipod to listen to she had no music to accompany her. Her dad had left her some money and she hadn't used it for food, so she would go and get a new ipod tomorrow at the mall. As she was walking she felt something hit her back. She turned around and saw Karofsky armed with some rocks.

"What are you doing?' Rachel exclaimed, worried about what was about to take place.

"I'm making you pay. Now that you don't have Hudson hovering around you your not so strong are you." Karofsky said angrily. He was pissed that she was making him look like an idiot at school. She was a loser and he was a jock. It was just the way it was. It was the school hierarchy and he couldn't have the glee club losers mixing with the popular kids. He had worked hard to get to where he was and in order to stay popular he had to make sure she stayed as a loser and didn't threaten him

"I haven't ever done anything to you, I don't know why you are doing this," Rachel said obviously confused.

Karofsky dropped the rocks and pushed her against the nearby fence. There wasn't anyone around and she didn't want to yell out for help.

'Listen Berry," Karofsky said while he held her from moving, "I'm sick of you talking back to me, stop questioning me."

"I will not concede to those terms,' Rachel stated. She knew that would cost her, but she was so over being pushed around by this idiot.

"Berry, I can't understand half the things you say most of the time," Karofsky spat out. As he held her against the fence, Rachel could feel her rib protesting in pain. She winced and Karofsky knew he was hurting her, but failed to cease. It only made him angrier.

'I don't know what Hudson even sees in you,' Karofsky said. The look in his eyes changed, and it scared Rachel. She could see the hate and understood that this guy was capable of a lot worse than pushing her against the fence. He took his right arm and lowered it. He began to trace his hand from her hip up to her boobs. She squirmed uneasily. He rested his hand onto of her sweater before deciding that he wanted to get a better feel. He held her back with his left arm, he had it firmly placed against her collarbone and the pain in her rib stopped her from protesting. He slid his hand under her sweated and made his way to her boobs. He went under her bra and a look of pleasure took over his face.

Rachel remained silent and didn't dare move. This was the first time she had been rendered speechless and she tried to hold back the tears fighting to be released from her eyes. She had barely let Finn get this far and to have someone like Karofsky take her power away from her was unbearable. He continued to fondle her while she remained mute, and her eyes were completely glazed. She could feel bruises forming on her body from where his hands were roughly attacking her.

Unable to take this violation any longer Rachel began to protest. She struggled underneath his grasp before ordering him to stop.

Karofsky smirked before saying, "Berry I know you like this. What's it like to have a real man touch you?"

"You're disguising," Rachel meekly said.

Karofsky growled and went to hit her but in doing so loosened his grip on her and she took the opportunity to run as fast as she could. She was only a few minutes away from her house and despite her rib burning in pain, she kept running until she made it to her door.

She fumbled through her bag until she retrieved her keys and quickly opened the door. Once inside she crumpled to the ground. Her sweated was untucked from her skirt and Karofsky had pulled two buttons off the front of it. She felt so gross; dirty and disguising and completely violated. She pulled herself up of the floor and made her way to the kitchen to take a few pain killers, before going upstairs to scrub herself clean. She pulled of her sweater and could already see three bruising forming on her torso. One on her back was in the shape of Karofsky hand and Rachel cringed at the sight. There was no way she was going to be able to see Finn tonight she thought. She grabbed her cell and texted an excuse about being really tired and just wanting to go to bed early. She knew Finn would understand and felt bad for lying. She threw her cell on her bed before making her way into the bathroom and turning on the taps to as hot as she could tolerate. Hot water and a lot of scrubbing was the only way to remove any trace of Karofsky Rachel thought. She stepped into the shower and the image of Karofsky face appeared and it was too much for Rachel to bare. She broke down, plain and simple. She cried and scrubbed and wished that this life wasn't hers and stayed like that for hours before making her way into bed and hoping that the sleepover would make her forget.


	5. Chapter 5

Rachel woke up feeling sleep deprived and sore. For once she was glad she didn't have to see her dads. Explaining her way out of yesterday would have been impossible Rachel thought to herself. Then she thought again. Maybe they wouldn't have even noticed her distress. They had barely picked up on the slushy attacks and whenever she had come home crying very few times had they asked her what was going on. Even then she merely placated their facade of anger and concern and then they let her be.

While Rachel contemplated getting out of bed she realised that she would have to forgo her elliptical training again; she was still in pain and as much as she wanted to train she knew it would only prolong and exacerbate her injuries. She swung her legs out of bed and gingerly stood up, wincing slightly from the pain. Remembering how she received the new injuries clouded Rachel's head with images of Karofsky. She felt like she had betrayed Finn, even though she didn't want it she couldn't shake the feeling of betrayal. She had two options; tell Finn everything or continue to hide the truth and handle things on her own. While the truth seemed like the most rational option, she didn't want to have to face the questions and probing that would come with that. If she just stayed out of Karofsky way, then maybe it would stop and she could just move on from what had happened and hope he left her alone. So in true Rachel Berry fashion, she pushed the events of the previous day out of her mind and decided to start the day afresh. She began to think about the impending sleepover and how much she had to do.

After a shower, Rachel decided what to wear for the day. She opted for some denim cut-offs and a cute t-shirt. It wasn't her usual style but it was casual and would suit her mall trip perfectly. She was on a mission for extra blankets and whole bunch of things for "beatifying" that Kurt had texted her while she was in the shower. She walked down the stairs, while gripping the banister for support and grabbed some cash from the stash her dads left her. She took and apple from the fruit bowl and thought that would suffice for breakfast seeing as she had to cut down on her exercise regime. She wasn't looking forward to the bus ride to and from the mall but without her dads to drive her around that was her only option as she knew Finn was going to some football game with Burt all morning.

The bus ride wasn't as bad as Rachel had anticipated. She saw a few girls from school, but they ignored her and apart from that it had been uneventful. She had picked up most of the things she needed but was stuck looking for a very specific facial scrub that Kurt had put on the list. After looking in a few stores she was about to give up before remembering that there was a beauty store upstairs that would have to have it. Armed with bags of shopping she ventured upstairs. With the help of sales assistant she had procured the scrub and now had everything she needed.

As she walked out of the store she began taking in her surroundings to figure out which was the exit nearest the bus depo. She was dreading catching the bus with all of the bags and having to walk the five minutes (ten in her current condition) from her stop to her house. Usually it wasn't a problem but her rib was really beginning to hurt and she cursed herself for forgetting to take the prescribed pain medication that morning. She looked around trying to remember the exit and then was completely taken aback when she saw Shelby walking towards her carrying Beth. Rachel thought that turning around would be enough to disguise herself from Shelby, as she was in different attire to what Shelby usually saw her in. However, she wasn't able to walk that quickly and it wasn't long before Shelby was basically walking beside her. Rachel wanted to run or disappear. Seeing her mother with her "new" daughter, the baby that she longed for was like a slap in the face. She was a teenager and Shelby didn't want that. She rejected her for a newer model and Rachel just wished that Shelby could move states so awkward encounters like this would never happen.

"Rachel?" Shelby said, faltering slightly.

Rachel began to flush and wished that Shelby could have just pretended to ignore her. She slowed her pace and turned around.

"Um hi Shelby," Rachel said softly.

Shelby was happier than she had ever been having Beth in her life but she still longed to have a relationship with Rachel. Although she had ultimate decided against it, she did so because she genuinely felt it was in Rachel's best interest. She now questioned that choice and perhaps should have asked Rachel how she felt, but she decided to cut and run; she was good at that and thought it would save everyone heartache. But holding Beth in her arms only made her want to hold Rachel in them more than ever.

"What are you up to?" God Shelby thought to herself, what an asinine question to ask.

Rachel could feel the tension between them and diverted her gaze by looking at Beth. God this must be hard for Quinn she thought. She must have run into Shelby and Beth a few times at least. Rachel realised that there had been quite a pause from when Shelby had asked her that question and refocused herself on the weirdness at hand.

"Just doing some shopping for a sleepover tonight at my house,' Rachel said smugly. She could have been a typical teenaged and muttered a one syllable answer, but she kind of wanted Shelby to know more about her life and like flaunting the fact that she had sort of become friends with the Glee girls.

"Oh, that sounds like fun. Are you here with your dad's?" Shelby questioned, hoping that she wasn't so they wouldn't bust her talking to Rachel. Rachel became visibly uneasy by the question and Shelby wondered what had made her uncomfortable.

"Um actually, I am by myself. My dad's are amazing but sometimes they don't understand what it's like for a girl to go shopping," Rachel said. She was sure that Shelby would understand.

"Oh well are they going to pick you up? You have a lot of stuff there."

Rachel didn't know what to say. She was a natural actress so lying wasn't a problem, but something was stopping her from fabricating another story.

"Actually, they are both busy this morning so I was going to take the bus home."

Shelby knew that Rachel's dads were busy. They were well regarded in the community and high up in their jobs. She came to the mall to pick up some formula for Beth and was going home herself so thought that maybe offering Rachel a ride might not be the worst idea ever.

"Well we were just on our way home, did you want a life? It's no trouble, I'd like to," Shelby said, hoping Rachel might take the offer.

Rachel stood there confused. Only a few months ago Shelby had been more than happy to see the last of her and now she was offering her a lift. She inwardly smiled and suddenly excited about spending some time alone with Shelby.

"um, ok," was all that Rachel replied.

She diligently followed Shelby out to her car and watched in amazement at how good she was with Beth. She couldn't help but wonder what her life would have been like had Shelby been even a small part of it.

They neared Shelby's car and she opened the boot so Rachel could put in her several large bags. While Shelby settled Beth in her seat Rachel began placing her bags in the boot. The movement involved extending her arms and she was taken aback by the sudden burning sensation throughout her mid section. She cried out in pain and dropped the bags in her hand to the floor. Shelby heard Rachel cry out and was immediately concerned. She raced around to the back of her range rover and saw Rachel slumped against the boot. She was practically on the ground and clinging to her side. Shelby dropped down to be beside her daughter and concern plagued her face.

"Rachel hunny are you ok?" Shelby felt all of her motherly instincts rushing to the forefront and wanted to comfort her daughter but didn't want to cross any boundaries.

Rachel turned her face to meet Shelby's gaze. She could see the genuine concern in Shelby's eyes and was actually pleased. Maybe she does care about me. She felt an urge to divulge everything that had been happening to her to Shelby but couldn't find the words.

"I'm ok. I tripped at school the other day and fractured a rib," Rachel said plainly. This lie had become truth in many ways.

"Oh my god," Shelby gasped.

She helped pull Rachel to her feet before demanding to inspect the injury.

"I'm fine Shelby. Really it's nothing," Rachel said, trying to divert any suspicion.

"Rachel you're not fine," Shelby said, she was worried and knew that Rachel acted stronger than she was. She lent in to lift up Rachel's shirt. Shelby questioned as to whether that was an entirely appropriate action, but couldn't stop herself.

Rachel tried to stop Shelby's hand, but wasn't quick enough. Shelby gasped as the bruise around Rachel's rib was completely visible accompanied by the fresh bruises Karofsky left yesterday. Shelby instinctively knew that these bruises weren't from a fall. Rachel stepped back and fought of Shelby's hand before realising that her guise might be up and reality may be coming.

"My god Rachel. What happened?" Shelby said while choking back tears.

Rachel started to freak. Just lie; just lie, she said over and over.

"It's nothing Shelby, it's just form where I fell," Rachel said quickly.

"Hunny, they don't look like you could have gotten them from falling."

"Well I did, and since when have you even cared about what happens to me?" Rachel said, deciding diverting this conversation was her only way out.

"Rachel, I have and always will care about you. I have only ever done what I thought was in your best interest."

Rachel couldn't believe what she was hearing. She practically begged this woman for a relationship and she walked out on her and now she wanted to act like a mother.

"You have to be joking! It wasn't in my best interest for you to tell me you didn't want to see me anymore. I wanted to get to know you, to know what it was like having a mother and you just left me," Rachel said. She was more mad than sad right now.

Shelby was shocked. She knew that Rachel wanted to have a relationship, but honestly thought that she would only be an intrusion and it would be best to leave her alone with her dads. They were her real family and Shelby could never truly be there for her like her dads.

"I'm sorry Rachel, I thought I was doing the best thing for you," Shelby said, reiterating the sentiment from her previous statement, hoping Rachel would understand her intention were good.

Rachel made her way back to the boot and mustered up all her strength to retrieve all of the bags before turning around to address Shelby.

"You didn't want to be a mother then, and I don't want you to be one now," Rachel said defiantly.

She left, walking as fast as her legs would take her with tears streaming down her face. All she wanted to do was run into Shelby's arms but too much had happened between them for such an embrace to happen. Rachel held so much resentment towards Shelby and seeing her with Beth only amplified that. She couldn't open up to her and tell her what was going on her life, who knows if she would even stick around to help her through everything. Rachel rounded her way to the bus terminal and fought back any remaining tears and hope like hell that Shelby would back off and not try and suddenly be a mother.

**AN: next chapter is the sleepover and it will be mostly bonding between the girls/Kurt. Also the boys are going to crash and perhaps a game of truth and dare will occur! BTW hope you all enjoyed that chapter.**


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: this is a long one and I would appreciate any advice on where to go with it! Thanks everyone for your reviews! They mean a lot :)**

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The first thing Rachel did as she walked through her front door was drop all of her shopping and go straight into the kitchen to dose up on some painkillers. She was starving, but not in the mood to eat. She just wanted the pain to stop; physical and emotional. She downed two painkillers and hoped they would start working soon. The events of the morning played over in her head like a bad lifetime movie.

God, she muttered to herself, how did everything get so complicated. Rachel's mind was like a prison, she couldn't escape the thoughts now plaguing her mind. Would Shelby start to interfere in her life? Would she say something to her dads? Would she even want to try and get to know Rachel after she insulted her and ran away like that? Focusing on the sleepover would hopefully alleviate some of these thoughts, so Rachel began getting everything in order. She set up her iTunes on the stereo and began blasting some Wicked. Her rib was feeling a lot better and she made a mental note to take some more pain killers later that evening. After setting up the makeover area Rachel began inflating some air mattresses in the lounge room. She was nearly finished when she heard the doorbell. She knew it was Kurt. He had insisted on coming over early to finalise everything, although Rachel felt she was more than capable of handling the set up of a sleepover. She mentally checked her appearance and hoped she wasn't looking too dishevelled. SHe hadn't changed since that morning and needed to take a shower before the girls came over. She knew Kurt would probably have some snide comment to make, and hesitated when opening the door.

"Hi miss Diva," Kurt said, whilst looking her up and down. "Where did you pull the cute shorts from? If you dressed more like this at school maybe those football guys would be too busy staring at your ass to think about slushing you."

Rachel stood at the door genuinely shocked. She didn't think she looked cute.

"Um, thanks Kurt," Rachel mumbled back before opening the door wider to let him in. "I've basically finished, but I wanted to go and have a shower before everyone got here so I trust that I can leave you down here and you won't completely change everything I've done," Rachel said apprehensively. She had never set up for a sleepover before and hoped that everything looked ok.

Kurt nodded, "No worries, you've done a good job."

Rachel smiled, she was looking forward to the evening and it was nice having Kurt talk to her like a friend.

"Thanks make yourself at home. There is food and drinks in the fridge and if you want to change the music, there is no shortage of Broadway classics,' as Rachel spoke she tossed her hair slightly and smiled.

"Great," Kurt said.

Rachel mad her way up the stairs feeling lighter. Despite everything that had gone down in the last week, tonight was going to be fun.

Kurt wandered around the Berry's house noting at all of the pictures of Rachel plastered on every wall and mantle. God her dad's did worship her, he thought. He noted the order of the house, everything seemed so clean and in place. He had been inside Rachel's house before when he decided to "make her over", but had never had a chance to wander around downstairs. Her dad's weren't home then either so Rachel had just escorted him to her room and he never really saw any other rooms. He decided that he would go through Rachel's wardrobe and pick her something cute out for the evening. He could hear the shower running and stealthy opened the closet door. Everything looked the same as the last time he had been here. Completely organised and colour co-ordinated. After wading through the startling amount of skirts and sweaters he found another pair of cute denim shorts that would look cute and white tank top that crossed over in the back. He wondered why Rachel had all of these clothes but never wore them to school. He took the items and laid them out over her bed. He heard the shower turn of and decided to go downstairs before Rachel came out.

Rachel had enjoyed the shower. It was another excuse to wash of any of Karofsky lingering germs and put the Shelby incident into perspective. She thought that maybe she had overreacted and Shelby wouldn't be all that concerned. She was a teenager and teenagers were known for being overly dramatic and that was especially true for Rachel. She opened her bathroom door and headed to her closet to get some underwear. She chose a cute gingham pair and found the matching bra. She was standing at her closet wondering what to wear when she hear Kurt call out to her.

"Rachel I took the liberty of choosing your outfit for the evening, it's on your bed."

Rachel looked over to her bed and found the shorts and top Kurt had laid out. She wasn't sure if she felt comfortable wearing the clothes in front of everyone. She didn't mind lounging around at home or the shops in cut offs, but having Santana, Quinn and Brittney see her in those clothes was completely different. They all had amazing bodies, and Rachel was shorter and felt much fatter than them. Showing off her legs in front of them was a scary prospect.

"I don't know Kurt. I don't want to look weird," Rachel said, not wanting to tell him she didn't want to look like a fat blimp.

Rachel then heard Kurt's footsteps from behind her closed bedroom door. She made a dash for her towel, but the door was already open. Here she was standing in her underwear and Kurt was staring right at her.

Kurt could tell Rachel felt uncomfortable. "Rach, please it's not like I haven't seen a girl in their underwear before and I'm not into girls remember, so don't look so shocked," He muttered.

"Have you heard of knocking before?" Rachel said loudly while still fumbling around looking for her towel, hoping Kurt wasn't scrutinising her.

"God the floor really did a number on you didn't it," Kurt remarked, obviously referring to her bruises.

Immediately Rachel became even more self conscious. Kurt was far enough away to not actually get a good look at the bruises and she wanted to keep it that way.

"Can you throw me that tank?" Rachel said, ignoring Kurt's rhetorical question.

Kurt grabbed the white tank form the bed and threw it over to Rachel. He could tell she was embarrassed and perhaps he should have knocked.

"Rachel I'm really sorry I just barged in on you. I didn't realise you wouldn't be dressed and I didn't intend on making you feel uncomfortable," Kurt said hoping that this would appease her.

Rachel grappled with the tank while Kurt spoke. Lifting her hands above her head wasn't exactly a piece of cake at the moment and she was rushing to cover herself up.

"I forgive you Kurt, you just took me by surprise. I mean I could have been naked," Rachel blurted out.

"Well there would be no coming back from that would there!" Kurt said laughing while he turned around to let Rachel get dressed in peace.

Rachel laughed and took the shorts off the bed, putting them on quickly. She walked over to her full length mirror and scrutinised the outfit.

"Kurt are you sure this is appropriate?" Rachel questioned, unsure whether it was all that suitable and flattering.

"Hunni you are gorgeous, and you really should start showing of your figure more," Kurt said enthusiastically, now by Rachel side and adjusting the top. He linked arms with her and escorted her downstairs.

While Kurt busied himself by the Berry's piano, Rachel was in the kitchen finishing off cooking some cookies. She decided she should dose up on some pain killers now so she wouldn't be in too much pain for the rest of the night. She took four pills, knowing that if two made her feel good then four should dull the pain completely. She downed the pills with some water and wandered to sit by Kurt as he played.

"Hey Rach, I didn't know you had so much sheet music. Since when do you play?" Kurt mused. He knew Rachel could play a little, but she always liked flaunting her musical skills and he was sure if she could play all of the sheet music here he would know about it.

"My dad's made me start when I was younger, it's just I don't think I'm that good so prefer not to play around people," Rachel said. She in fact had been playing the piano for years, but her dad had made an offhand remark to her daddy a few years ago, that she didn't have enough skill to become an accomplished player. They hadn't realised she had heard them, but ever since she mostly played in private.

"You can't be that bad. Well how you play and I sing?" Kurt questioned. He pulled out the music to _Girls just wanna have fun_.

Rachel conceded and then laughed at his music selection. Kurt scooted over and she sat down next to him.

She played slowly and not a note was out of place. She couldn't help herself and started singing along with Kurt. They were both really into it and Kurt chose a few more songs to sing. It wasn't until the doorbell rang that they realised an hour had passed.

Rachel raced over to the door, feeling slightly light headed; she hadn't eaten for hours and felt slightly giddy by the feeling. She stood at the door nervously before opening it.

"Hi Rachel," Tina and Mercedes said in unison. Tina was wearing shorts and a t-shirt – very un-Tina like and Mercedes had on a cute summer dress.

'Hey girls, come on in," Rachel said while Kurt rushed over and gave both girls a hug before escorting them to the "beauty room".

"Wow guys, this looks impressive!" Tina said, looking forward to the evenings activities.

Mercedes took over the sound system with her iPod and put on some r'n'b that got everyone in the mood for dancing. The doorbell went again and Kurt went to answer it as Rachel went to the kitchen to get the last batch of cookies out of the oven.

"Hi girls," Kurt said, Santana, Quinn and Brittany were at the door, all looking a bit like they had better things to do. The girls came in and said their hellos to everyone.

"Ok is everyone ready to get their drink on?" Santana asked. She had brought over loads of alcohol and was ready to get drunk.

"Um, I thought maybe we could do the makeovers while we were still sober," Kurt said.

Santana instantly threw him a death stare.

"Ok, maybe a little bit to drink would be ok," Kurt said, not wanting to unleash the wrath of Santana.

"Great! I'll go get some cups," Santana said before wandering off to the kitchen.

"Hey Rachel, where are the cups?" Santana said while looking Rachel up and down. "You don't look half bad Berry when you decide to dress like a normal teenager."

Rachel accepted the compliment and couldn't help but smile a little. It wasn't often that a girl like Santana would say something nice to her. "The cups are just in the cupboard above you. Did you want a drink?" Rachel said, unaware that Santana planned on getting everyone wasted.

"Yeah I bought over some alcohol and want to get started," Santana quipped.

"You know how bad that is for your voice?" Rachel asked.

"Come on Berry, live a little. I bet you have never been drunk in your life have you?" Santana snorted. She was beginning to like Rachel, but the girl acted like anything but a teenager sometimes.

While Santana looked around for the cups she noticed the pain medication on the counter. She didn't say anything, but was a little concerned that Rachel was having to take medication for the supposed fall on the floor. She had heard the story and new it was bullshit, but wasn't going to press it.

"Fine," Rachel said relenting. "I suppose one drink never killed anybody."

The girls gathered up some cups and made their way into the lounge. Rachel wasn't surprised to see Kurt had already started working his magic on the girls. Santana set the cups on the dining table, she laughed to herself because Rachel had already laid down placemats for the cups. Santana ventured further into the dining room and noticed a liquor cabinet in the corner.

"Berry are you holding out on me?" Santana asked.

"What are you talking about?" Rachel yelled from the next room where she was watching Kurt's demonstration of the right way to apply eyeliner on the upper eyelid.

"I'm talking about this min bar you have over here."

Rachel got up, nervous that Santana was going to crack open all of her dad's expensive wine.

"Santana that's my dad's. We can't drink that," Rachel warned sternly.

"They aren't going to notice if we take a little bit of everything. It's only if we drank all of one bottle. Any anyway we can just add some water to the clear spirits and it will look like we never drank them," Santana said reassuringly.

Rachel thought this was a bad idea. She didn't want her dad's to be angry, but then thought that maybe drinking some of their alcohol would be a great way to get their attention.

"Ok, but as long as we don't drink too much," Rachel said, not wanting to look like she was now all for the idea.

Santana busied herself making up cocktails for everyone while Rachel rejoined the others and sat dutifully for Kurt while he did a full face of makeup for her.

"Wow Rachel, you look good!" Mercedes said at Kurt's handiwork.

Rachel looked at herself in the mirror Kurt had handed her and thought she did look pretty. She was a toned down version of the previous makeover Kurt had given her. It was subtle, yet brought attention to her eyes and high cheekbones.

"Thanks Kurt," Rachel said smiling.

"Ok guys, who is ready for some drinks?" Santana yelled out.

Everyone gathered around in the dining room while Santana dished out her concoction. Rachel tentatively took her first sip and was surprised it tasted really good.

"Santana this actually isn't bad," Quinn said. Although she had sworn off alcohol since her last encounter with it had led to Beth, she thought she would need some to get through the evening. Santana smirked; her mission tonight was not only to get drunk herself, but to get everyone else drunk too. Lately she had been really feeling disappointed in herself and alcohol helped dull the feeling. She was sick of being the school slut, yes she perpetuated the image, but if she didn't act proud of it then everyone would use it against her.

"Ok time for round two," Santana said noticing that everyone had quickly downed their first drink.

An hour later and the kids had downed another two drinks. Mercedes was dominating the music system and everyone was dancing around to Rihanna. Rachel was surprised that her rib and the bruises didn't hurt at all and she was feeling back to her old self. After an exhaustive dance performance to Umbrella, the kids fell to the floor in giggles. Mercedes turned the music down and Brittany suggested they play truth or dare.

"Ok anyone who wimps out has to take a shot of Vodka," Santana said. "Agreed?"

Everyone nodded and the group sat in a circle.

"Ok who wants to start?" Quinn asked.

"I'll start," Kurt said readily. "Brittany, truth or dare?"

"Umm, truth," Brittany said excited.

"Ok, have you and Santana really done the nasty?" Kurt knew the girls had a "thing" going on, as did everyone else, but wanted to know if they had actually had sex.

Brittany giggled before nodding.

"My turn!" Brittany yelled. "Rachel truth or dare?"

Rachel was surprised that Brittany had chosen her. "Um dare," Rachel said, not really feeling like she was in a truthful mood.

"Ok I dare you to kiss Quinn."

"What?" Rachel said shocked.

"Come on you have to Rachel or otherwise you will have to take a shot," Brittany said, reminding her of the rules.

"Umm Quinn is that weird for you?" Rachel questioned.

"Please Berry, I've been having sleepovers with Santana and Brittany since I was ten, so I've kissed a girl before," Quinn said, it wasn't like kissing was a big deal.

Rachel was a little taken aback, but decided that kissing Quinn was better than having more to drink. She was already having difficulty seeing straight and more alcohol would only make it worse.

"Ok, I'll do it," Rachel said. Quinn lent in to where Rachel was sitting and the girls kissed. A million thoughts were racing through Rachel's head. Was this weird? Was it cheating on Finn? But Quinn's lips were really soft and delicate and she decided it wasn't the worst dare in the world.

"There are you happy?" Rachel asked after completing the dare.

"Very," Brittany replied with a bit of laugh in her voice.

The game continued for a while, before Santana declared it was time for a real drinking game.

"How about we play have you ever?" Santana asked.

"What Rachel will be even more drunk five minutes in," Quinn said.

"Quinn I will have you know that I do have a boyfriend and not as much of a prude as everyone thinks," Rachel said, she really was a bit uptight in doing stuff with Finn but she wanted the moment to be perfect.

"I'll start," Rachel said. "I've never had a baby."

"Ouch!" Kurt said.

Quinn shot Rachel a death stare before taking a shot of vodka.

"Alright, my turn," Quinn said after downing the vodka. "I've never been slushied three times in one day."

Rachel looked around. She knew everyone here had been slushied except for Santana and Brittany, but she had been the only one slushied three times in a day. She silently took her shot before the game continued.

"I've never made out with someone in the janitor closet," Tina said. She thought it was a lame thing to say, but knew that a lot of the girls here had done it.

Quinn, Brittany, Santana and Rachel all took a shot.

"I've never exercise in pink lycra," Kurt said.

Mercedes, Rachel and Brittany all took a shot.

"Mercedes?" Kurt questioned. "Disappointed," Kurt said laughing.

Suddenly they group heard a banging sound coming from the backyard and all looked at each other. It was nearly midnight and they were all drunk, so whatever it was got them all quiet very quickly.

"What was that?" Mercedes whispered while turning the music off.

"I have no idea?" Rachel answered. Everyone stood up and Rachel felt the world spin a little as she did. She grabbed the nearby couch for support.

"It's probably just the boys trying to scare us," Santana said. She had heard them making plans about coming over and attempting to freak them out the other day.

"What?" Brittany said, she was a little confused.

"I heard them talking about it the other day while we were planning the sleepover," Santana said.

Kurt marched to the back door and turned on the lights. He opened up the backdoor before deciding that no one was out there. "I can't see anything," Kurt yelled before rejoining the group.

They all started to nervously giggle.

"Ok lets have another drink," Santana suggested in order to lighten the mood a little. Everyone made their way into the kitchen, but Santana noticed Rachel slumped down in the couch.

"Rachel are you feeling ok?" Santana said, worry lacing her voice.

Rachel looked up at her, her vision a little clouded and her heart was racing. "Yeah, just a little drunk," Rachel croaked out. In truth she was feeling more than drunk, she was feeling wasted. Santana helped Rachel get up and dragged her into the kitchen to join the group.

Kurt had been busying himself pouring weird mixed drinks for everyone that he declared tasted amazing. Rachel wasn't sure that drinking anymore would be a good idea, but her mind was all over the place, so when Brittany handed her a glass, she absentmindedly drank the entire thing. Santana looked on, but didn't stop her. She didn't want to appear like she now suddenly cared for Rachel and her wellbeing.

The sat around in the kitchen, talking about glee and boys when they all heard more noise and banging, this time coming from the front of the house.

"It has to be the boys!" Santana said slightly irritated.

Quinn rushed to the front door and could make out what appeared to be Puck and Mike sneaking around the side of the house.

"I totally just saw Puck and I think Mike was with him," Quinn gushed.

"I knew it," Santana said. "They are so lame."

They all headed out the front door, Rachel grabbed on to Tina for support and Tina stroked her back as they made their way out the front.

"Guy we know you are here," Brittany said.

There was no response.

Rachel's eyelids suddenly became really heavy and she stumbled. Tina shot her a worried glance and held onto her arm tighter. Rachel fought to keep her eyes open but the urge to sleep was so strong. Mixing the sleeping pills with all of the alcohol was probably a bad idea. Suddenly Rachel faltered and while Tina tried to keep her upright, it was no use.

"Guys!" Tina yelled.

Everyone turned around and saw Rachel had fallen to the ground.

"Rachel? Rachel, open your eyes?" Tina said. She shook Rachel slightly.

Santana was instantly by Rachel's side. "Don't stress, let's get her inside. She's never drank alcohol before, she's just overdone it."

"Boys a little help. Rachel just fainted," Quinn yelled down the side of the house.

Mike, Puck, Sam and Finn all appeared with worried looks on their faces. As Finn took in what Quinn just said he rushed where Rachel was. She looked pale and smaller than usual. He turned agrily to the girls.

"You guys know she doesn't drink," Finn said, rage coming to the surface.

"Finn chill, it's not like we forced her," Mercedes said.

Finn picked Rachel up and took her inside to the couch while the group just watched on before following inside. Santana went to the kitchen to get a glass of water while Finn brushed Rachel's hair out of her face.

"Maybe we should just let her sleep it off?" Puck suggested.

"No way, people can die from that can't they?" Brittany said. She head hear about this on the news and whenever she drank forced herself to stay awake for hours until it wore off.

Santana handed the water to Finn. She then took to pacing the floor, wondering if Rachel had taken any pain tablets and if so how many. Finn ordered Tina to get a cold wash cloth and continued to shake Rachel.

"Shouldn't she like wake up?" Finn said, not really knowing what to do. "I mean is this normal?"

"I don't know," Mercedes said, truthfully she had never really drunk much before and wasn't sure if this was normal or not.

"Look, I've seen heaps of drunk chicks in my time, and she is going to be fine," Puck said reassuringly. Usually he didn't really think much about Rachel, but he did actually care about her. They were both Jewish and had been going to Temple together for years.

Santana continued to question whether or not to mention the pills. Maybe she should, maybe Rachel was actually in trouble here.

"Guys, I saw some pain killers in the kitchen before. I think maybe Rachel has been taking them for her rib. You aren't meant to mix them with alcohol at all, trust me I've done it before and I was so off my face it wasn't good," Santana said hoping she had done the right thing.

"What?" Finn yelled, "She wouldn't do that. Rachel is smarter than that."

"Guys, maybe we should call her dad's. Isn't one of them a doctor?" Tina asked.

"No, they are away on business and Rachel would freak if we did that," Finn said, knowing that her dad's were hours away.

"Well who else can we call?" Mercedes said, she knew that Rachel didn't have any other family that lived close by.

"Is it too weird to call Mr Schue?" Quinn suggested. "I mean we could call Kurt's dad or Finn's mum, but Rachel would be mortified."

Everyone looked at each other before deciding maybe Mr Schue was the best option.

"Ok, I'll do it," Santana offered. She flipped through her cell phone until she found his number and dialled.

"Hello," Will said. He was in bed hours ago and was surprised to see what her thought was Santana's caller ID on his phone.

"Um Mr Schue, I know it's late, but we have a little situation and didn't know who else to call," Santana said, trying to sound calm.

Will pulled himself out of bed, knowing that something was going on. He was glad the kids felt like they could trust him and didn't mind them calling him.

"What's going on?" Will asked, concern evident in his voice.

"Umm it's Rachel, look we think she may have taken some pain pills and mixed it with alcohol. She has never drunk before and she won't wake up. She has been out cold for like five minutes now," Santana's facade of calmness was breaking as she spoke.

"Where are you guys?"

"We are at Rachel's house?"

"I'm coming right over," Will said. He wasn't sure if they should have taken her to a hospital but he lived less than five minutes away so he would be there as soon as he could.

Will threw on some clothes and broke a few road rules but was at Rachel's house in record time. He knocked loudly on the door and was greeted by an upset Brittany. Will took in the situation and rushed over to Rachel. Finn still had her in his arms.

"Rachel hunni, Rachel are you ok?" Will said, hoping to elicit some response.

To everyone's surprise Rachel groaned. She slowly opened her eyes before closing them again.

"Let's get her to the bathroom," Will said thinking that she may need to vomit very soon.

Finn picked her up and took her into her parent's ensuite.

"Rachel open your eyes again, come on," Will said almost demandingly.

Rachel was in such a haze. She could hear the voices and was trying like hell to respond, but it was so hard and the darkness was pulling her back.

Will turned on the tap and took the washcloth draped over Rachel's head. He wet it again before replacing it. The coldness triggered Rachel's senses and she opened her eyes again.

"That's a good girl, come on Rach you are going to be ok," Will reassured her.

Rachel fought against every impulse wishing her to sleep and opened her eyes. The overwhelming sense of nausea took over and she began to heave. Will guided her to the toilet while Finn and the other kids watched on. She began to vomit and was shaking violently. The pain in her rib became excruciating and was making it hard for her to breath.

"Rach, did you take pain killers tonight?" Will asked, knowing that she probably had.

Rachel nodded her head, tears were filling her eyes from the vomiting and she looked terrible.

"How many did you take?" Will asked, trying to keep his composure in front of the girl breaking in front of him.

Rachel was yet to speak and her throat was killing. She managed to softly squeak out four.

Will looked towards Santana. "How much did she drink?"

Santana was actually unsure. They had all drunk a lot, but unlike Rachel, most of the girls had drunk before. "Um I'm not sure, probably at least nine shots, maybe more?" Santana said guilt bubbling up inside her.

"Oh my god guys, do you know how dangerous that is?" Will questioned. He had done the same thing when he was younger so really had no right to judge.

Rachel's head was slunk over the toilet and she wasn't ready to move just yet. Sweat dripped of her forhead and Will rubbed her back.

"Rachel, where are your dads? I have to tell them what's going on," Will stated matter of factly.

Rachel couldn't speak; her head was spinning and couldn't think straight at all.

"Um her dad's are out of town Mr Schue," Kurt said.

Will racked his brain. He couldn't bring Rachel back to his house, but she needed someone to watch over her. The only person he could think to call was Shelby. He instructed Finn to give Rachel some water and gave the other kids a stern look before exiting the bathroom. He pulled out his cell and dialled Shelby's number.

"Will? What are you doing, it's the middle of the night?" Shelby said as she answered her phone.

"It's Rachel," Will didn't know how else to put the situation.

"What's wrong? Oh my god is she hurt?" Shelby was beginning to imagine the worst possible scenario.

"Look, I know it's late, but can you come over to her house. She mixed pain pills with alcohol and isn't doing the best," Will said, he was sure it was just a stupid teenage mistake, but Rachel wasn't a stupid teenager.

"I'm on my way," and with that Shelby called an emergency sitter and raced over to the Berry's house.

Will instructed all of the kids to go home. He assured them Rachel would be fine and he would call them in the morning. The boys hadn't been drinking so offered to give the girls lifts to their respective homes. Santana knew her mum was away under the guise of having a weekend with the girls, but in reality she was most defiantly having an affair, and her dad was at the hospital all night so offered everyone to go back to hers. Everyone jumped at the offer, because no one wanted to explain to their parents why they were coming home in the middle of the night from a sleepover that wasn't meant to finish yet. Finn didn't want to leave Rachel, but Will assured him she was going to be ok and he eventually left. Will stayed in the bathroom with Rachel wondering how the hell this all happened. He rubbed her back and tried to get some water into her, but she was slipping in and out of consciousness and wan't very responsive. He was wondering if she needed to go to the hospital and would consult with Shelby when she arrived. Rachel was weazing slightly and he hoped that her rib injury hadn't gotten worse form the heaving.

Will heard thumping at the front door and then Shelby's worried voice.

"Will?" Shelby called.

"Come in Shelby' Will yelled out, "I'm in the bathroom." He could hear Shelby open the door and her frantic footsteps as she raced to the bathroom.

"Oh my god Will," was all Shelby could say as she took in the state of her daughter.

"Where are her dads?" Shelby questioned.

"They are out of town, and it has been proving difficult to reach them," Will replied after having Quinn try and phone them both several times.

Shelby knelt down next to Rachel and stroked her hair out of her eyes. She was deathly pale and her breathing seemed laboured.

"Rachel? Rachel sweetie, it's Shelby." Shelby shot Will a worried look when Rachel refused to interact.

"She has been in and out of it since I got here," Will said.

Then Rachel groaned, and vomited again. She became a little more alert and was mortified when she realised that Shelby was there.

"Will can you go upstairs and run Rachel a bath? I am pretty sure there is one in her room. It shouldn't be hard to miss there is a lot of pink" Shelby said, trying to remember the layout of the house form the one time she was here when helping Rachel with her gaga costume.

Will headed upstairs, hoping that Rachel was going to be ok.

"Rachel sweetie, what happened?" Shelby said, trying to illicit some response from her daughter.

Rachel took the washcloth from her head and rubbed her face. She could taste the vomit in her mouth and preferred it when she was unconscious.

'What are you doing here?" Rachel asked blearily.

"Will called me. He couldn't reach your dad's and I guess I was the next best thing," Shelby said a little worried Rachel was going to suddenly transform into the girl she had been that afternoon and demand she leave her house now. But instead Rachel slunk into Shelby and Shelby continued to stroke her hair. Rachel enjoyed the feeling of Shelby's concern and while the circumstances for getting it were not ideal, it was still nice.

Will came downstairs and was relieved to see Rachel had her eyes open and looking a little better.

"Will can you help me get her upstairs and into the bath?" Shelby asked, thinking it was best t get her cleaned up.

Will obediently bent down and helped pick Rachel up. She attempted to stand, but was still extremely unstable and Will had to partially carry her the entire way. When they were in Rachel's room He laid her on her bed. Rachel curled into a ball, she just wanted to sleep. Shelby instructed her to sit up and then ordered Will out of the room while she helped Rachel undress. Rachel was so out of it she wasn't thinking about the bruises and as Shelby took her top of she tried to understand why Shelby had a look of horror plastered all over her face. Shelby was genuinely shocked. She had seen the bruises that morning but it was form a distant. These were not from a fall and she began to wonder if perhaps her dad's had been hurting her. Rachel began to get dizzy. Her rib was killing and Shelby's reaction was intense. She tried to get up from the bed, but immediately fell down.

"Rachel?" Shelby said while shaking her daughter. "Will!"

Will rushed back up the stairs as he heard Shelby call out. He opened Rachel's door to find her again passed out.

"I think we need to get her to the hospital Shelby," Will said alarmed at Rachel's state.

"Will look at her bruises," Shelby didn't know if it was entirely appropriate to have her teenage daughter in a state of undress in front of her teacher, but she was really didn't know what to do.

Will looked to where Shelby was pointing and gasped. He knew she had hurt her rib, but there were three other large bruises and one distinctly looked like a hand print. Will breather slowly, trying to control his anger.

"This isn't good," Will finally said.

"Do you think it's her dads?" Shelby asked.

Will doubted it, her dad's were hardly around, but it was definitely possible. He knew Finn would never lay a hand on her.

"Maybe?" Will said, unsure of the right thing to say.

Rachel fluttered her eyes again, before attempting to sit up.

"Take it easy sweetie,' Shelby said, relieved that Rachel was back. "Will let's get her into the bath and then take it from there."

Will helped Rachel get up and took her to the bath. He put her on the side of the tub while Shelby finished undressing her and then went to find her some pyjamas. He slightly opened the door, keeping his eyes to the ground and handed Shelby the clean clothes. He was upset. He knew that things weren't right with Rachel for a while but he was still no closer to the truth. After ten minutes Shelby emerged with a clean and freshly dressed Rachel. Rachel was adamant that she didn't need to go to the hospital and Shelby said that she was going to stay and watch her until the next day. She called her sitter to inform her she wouldn't be home for a while and then let Will know he could go.

"Are you going to be ok on your own?" Will questioned, he was concerned about Rachel and didn't know if he should leave.

"I will be fine Will, she seems a lot better and I'm not going to take my eyes off her. If anything changes I will call an ambulance," Shelby said reassuringly.

Will begrudgingly left and made Shelby promise to text him every hour on Rachel's progress.

Meanwhile the kids had all arrived at Santana's house and they were visibly shaken up.

"Wow some night," Kurt said, saying what everyone felt.

'I know, I hope she is going to be ok," Brittany said, tears damp on her face.

"Guys, she is going to be fine. She is Rachel fricken Berry," Puck stated, he knew she was one tough girl and it would take more than a little alcohol to take her down.

"I'm worried about her. I know she can be a major pain in the ass, but she hasn't been coping all that well lately," Kurt said, he didn't want to reveal what had happened at the start of the week to anyone, he had promised Rachel. But he was concerned that she was hiding something.

"I agree, she hasn't been the same recently. I don't know I just feel like she hasn't been honest with me," Finn added, he had noticed Rachel had become a little withdrawn lately and didn't like it.

"Guys she just got drunk and mixed it with pills. It was a mistake, she will be fine by Monday," Quinn said, hoping that it would be true.

The kids tried to put their worry aside and got ready for bed. Santana's place was huge and they dragged a few mattresses to the living room, and set up a makeshift sleeping area. They stayed up for a while longer, talking about school and Glee and anything that would make them feel better before finally falling asleep.


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: thank you everyone for reviewing! It makes me happy to know people are liking this story. This chapter is pretty uneventful. I want to tone down the dram for the next few before building it back up again becasue when I do it will probably be pretty heavy. Ope you enjoy :)**

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Rachel's eyes fluttered open and the first thing she felt was a pounding headache. As she struggled to sit up, she tried to piece the events of the previous night back together. It was meant to be a fun girl's night, but it had turned into anything but that. God why was she so stupid! She had ruined what was meant to be her first real sleepover by being an idiot and drinking too much. Before she could continue her self-deprecation, a worried Shelby peeked her head around her bedroom door. Rachel freaked, what the hell was Shelby doing here? Why couldn't she remember everything that had happened?

"You look a bit worse for wear," Shelby said tentatively. Rachel was going to recover from the events of last night, but something else was going on with Rachel and Shelby had made it her mission to find out what.

Rachel was rendered speechless. She was sitting in her bed, staring at her mother, whom she had had a massive argument with yesterday and now she was in her house. Rachel truly did not know what to say. Shelby sensed her daughter's confusion and made her way to the bed and sat down next to Rachel.

"Rachel, do you remember what happened last night?"

Rachel shook her head. She had a fair idea of what went down but was beyond embarrassed to actually admit to that.

"Well sweetie, you had a bit too much to drink and mixed it with the medication for your rib. You were really sick. The kids didn't know what was going on and called Will who then called me," Shelby said slowly and methodically. She tried to remain detached when repeating the events. Rachel had given her one hell of a fright last night. Seeing Rachel like that made her put her life into perspective and all she wanted now was to get to know Rachel while she had a chance.

Rachel inwardly groaned. Oh my god, she thought, Mr Schue was here?

"Does everyone hate me?" Rachel asked, she thought that if all of the kids disliked her before then now they must want to kill her for making Mr Schue aware they were drinking.

God she could have died, Shelby thought, and all Rachel cared about was what everyone thought of her.

"Of course they don't hunni, they were all very worried. Will practically had to pry Finn away from you to get him to leave." Shelby took in Rachel's expression when she said this. While Rachel was trying to keep her composure, she had always played by the rules and had never gotten herself into any real trouble, so doing something like this was out of the ordinary and she felt incredible guilty for making Finn worried. "Listen why don't you get cleaned up and come down stairs. We can go out for breakfast if you want? We have a lot to talk about."

While the thought of rehashing last night's events was not something Rachel wanted to do, she did want to spend time with Shelby. She worried that after her behaviour yesterday, Shelby would never want to see her again.

'I'd actually like that," Rachel said while trying to hide the creeping feeling of nausea. "Umm Shelby, have you told my dad's what happened?"

Shelby knew this question was coming and there was no way to sugar coat the answer. "I actually got a hold of your daddy this morning. He is going to be calling you later to discuss what happened, he wanted to come home but he can't get away from work. I tried ringing your dad, but he is still working on that case and isn't able to be reached."

Rachel mulled this over. She wondered if her dad's were mad that Shelby was in their home and looking after her. They hadn't wanted Shelby to have any access to Rachel until she was 18, so she found it strange that they were now on what seemed to be speaking terms with each other. She had also thought that the fact that she had been acting out and drunk herself stupid last night would be enough of a rebellious act to get at least one of her dad's home. Rachel tried to hide her disappointment and confusion over the entire situation.

"Oh ok. Well I'm going to go and have a shower then."

Shelby watched Rachel escape to the sanctuary of the bathroom and wondered what the hell she was getting herself into. She couldn't understand what Rachel's dad's problem was. When she had met them they were the nicest guys who had longed to have a child for years. She felt that giving them a baby would be an amazing gift and never doubted their ability to love and raise a child. But now it seemed like Rachel was anything but their first priority. Then she thought back to her own behaviour over the last few months and realised that she hadn't acted so differently from them. She had pushed and pushed to get into contact with Rachel and then just walked out on her. No wonder Rachel was having problems, she had no structure or boundaries from her parents and she clearly was craving attention. She began to wonder if perhaps Rachel was hurting herself as a way to get noticed. Maybe she had purposely fallen in hopes that her dad's would have come running to her side and given her the contact she so desperately was craving.

Shelby busied herself cleaning up downstairs while she waited for Rachel to appear. All she could think about was how she was going to handle asking Rachel about what was going on. She could see not diplomatic way to ask if Rachel was harming herself and really wished she had more experience being a mother. It was forty five minutes before Rachel appeared and Shelby was still no closer to figuring out what to say.

"I'm ready Shelby," Rachel said meekly, she knew an interrogation of some sort was coming, how could it not?

Shelby took in her daughter's appearance. She was back to animal sweaters and knee high socks. Where does she get her fashion sense from, Shelby wondered, although she did look cute.

'Great Hun, let's get going."

They decided to stop at a cafe known for its wide choice of vegetarian/vegan options; it was the only one in Lima so Rachel was practically on first name terms with everyone that worked there. The pair decided to sit outside as it was a nice sunny morning and Shelby didn't want too many people overhearing the conversation they were about to have. After ordering, Shelby finally plucked up the courage to stop with the small talk and do some digging.

"Rachel, I have to be honest with you. Last night when I was helping you get cleaned up and dressed, I noticed that you had a few really pretty bad bruises. I know that you didn't get them from a fall and one even looked like a hand print. I need to know what is going on," Shelby said, relieved to have finally said what she was dreading.

Rachel started to panic. She had been lying to long to tell the truth now and she was so embarrassed about being bullied that telling the truth became a painful reminder that she was a nobody at school.

"Shelby there is no need to be concerned; my dance partner at ballet merely accidently bruised me while performing a lift. I assure you I am completely fine," Rachel aid, relieved to have gotten that out.

Shelby watched intently as Rachel spoke. Her response seemed to rehearsed and she sat there so calmly while speaking.

"Rachel, I'm not completely convinced that that is the truth. If someone is hurting you, you don't need to be scared. If it's your dad's or someone else, we can deal with it."

Rachel was dumbfounded. Did Shelby really think her dad's were violent?

"My dad's would never lay a hand on me. They love me. Yes they may be busy, but they would never hurt me. I am telling you the truth Shelby," Rachel said with tears in her eyes.

Shelby instantly felt bad for insinuating that she was being abused by her dad's. She was pretty sure that Rachel wasn't protecting them and that perhaps she did get hurt in ballet.

"I'm sorry hunni, I didn't mean to make you upset. I was just worried and wanted to make sure that you were safe at home."

"I am safe at home and while I appreciate your concern, it's hard for me to accept your intrusion into my personal life when you have been absent from it for so long," Rachel croaked out.

That comment stung, but Shelby knew that Rachel had every right to still hold resentment towards her.

"I really want us to work Rachel. I am truly sorry for what happened between us last time, but I am not going to leave you. All I want is to get to know you and be a part of your life if you'll let me," Shelby said, laying her heart on the line knowing Rachel could break it at any moment.

Rachel was a little shocked at Shelby's determinedness to be a part of her life. While she seemed committed, Rachel was still hesitant and was scared about being hurt again.

"I want to get to know you too Shelby, I really do, but it's going to be hard for me. I can't rush into this. We need to take it slowly.'

Shelby nodded in agreeance and hoped that she could eventually get Rachel's trust. She decided that nay more prying into the bruises was going to be futile and decided that in order for Rachel to trust her, she was going to have to trust Rachel.

Rachel took her hand and put it over Shelby's, feeling the warmth of her mother's hand made her very emotional and she fought back tears. She felt close and connected to Shelby and she like that feeling. It made a part of her whole.

"Rachel, I am prepared to do take things at whatever pace you are good with," Shelby said and then bought her daughter into a hug.

They were interrupted by the arrival of their food and then Rachel launched into a conversation about all things Broadway. They had so much lost time to make up on and Shelby was eager to get to know as much about her daughter as possible.

After breakfast, Shelby took Rachel home and then had to leave to relieve the sitter. She assured Rachel that she could call any time and they were going to meet up the following Wednesday to have dinner. After the events of last night Rachel was surprised to find herself happy. She decided it was time to turn on her phone and see if any of the glee kids had messaged her. Ten messages and twelve missed calls flashed dup on her screen. All the glee kids were worried about her, and no one seemed angry. She decided to promptly message everyone back and thank them for their concern and apologise for ruining what was meant to be a fun night. After she did that she decided that she better call Finn.

"Hello?" Finn said as he picked up his cell.

"Hi Finn, it's just me," Rachel replied, hoping that she hadn't worried Finn to much.

'Oh God Rachel, are you ok? I've been so worried, everyone has."

"I'm fine, just feeling stupid. I can't believe that I mixed pills with alcohol. Are you mad?" Rachel questioned, hoping that he wasn't.

"Of course I'm not mad, I'm just surprised that you did that. You don't even drink Rach."

"I know, it was stupid. I just wanted to engage in normal teenage activates for once. I wanted to feel like a part of the group," Rachel said, knowing that was a bad excuse but it was mostly true.

"I understand that Rach, just don't scare me like that again. The thought of something happening to you is too much," Finn chocked out.

"I won't, I promise."

"Can I come over and see you?" Finn asked.

"How about I come over to yours. I wanted to apologise to Kurt in person anyway."

"Ok sounds good babe, come over whenever. I love you."

"I love you too," Rachel replied before hanging up her phone.

Rachel grabbed a jacket and headed out the door. Finn lived about a fifteen minute walk away, but she didn't mind because she was craving exercise and freedom. As she walked her phone buzzed and she instantly felt sick as soon as she saw the caller ID. It was her daddy calling her, just like Shelby said he would.

"Hi Daddy"

"Rachel I spoke with Shelby this morning and want to know what is going on," Hiram Berry demanded. He was extremely upset when Shelby had phoned him. He was angry about her being in his home with his daughter, but he was a five hour flight away and it was impossible for him to leave.

"Look dad, I was stupid. I drank a little alcohol but didn't realise that mixing it with my pain medication would have such an adverse effect," Rachel mumbled feeling guilty for upsetting her dad.

"Rachel, I don't understand what has gotten into you. Dad and I leave you by yourself because we thought we could trust you. I thought you were too old for a sitter, but maybe I was wrong," Hiram began to question himself. Leaving a teenager alone so much was bound to have consequences; he hoped that this was just a one off.

"Daddy, I'm so sorry. I know you must be angry with me. I will never do something so reckless again," Rachel pleaded, not wanting her father to be disappointed in her.

"I'm sorry, this is partly my fault. I should be home more," Hiram muttered, he thought that perhaps he needed a priority adjustment.

"No daddy, I know how important your work is and now when I get to see you our time together is even more special."

Hiram felt better by this. Rachel had placated him, which really wasn't hard to do because he enjoyed being away from Lima. AS much as he loved his daughter and his partner he liked having his own separate life and the guilt of being away was made easier by the work he was doing.

"Rachel, I'm concerned about Shelby. I don't want her around you. After the debacle of what happened earlier this year, I don't want her upsetting you," Hiram said, he was angry that Shelby felt she could just reappear in Rachel's life.

"Daddy, I'll do whatever you want," Rachel said, but secretly she planned on continuing to see Shelby. She loved having someone around that understood her and shared so many similarities with and she wasn't about to just give that up.

"Ok sweetie, I have to go, but I will be home in a few weeks and dad should be home next week, so just use the credit card and I'll see you soon. I love you sweetie."

"I love you too Daddy," Rachel said just before the line went dead. Rachel spent the remained of her walk thinking about how she was going to juggle her parental situation.

She had pushed all thoughts of Karofsky's attack on her as far away as she could and would not entertain any thoughts of what events had transpired between them. Though going over to see Finn made it hard to keep those thoughts at bay. She was planning on getting pretty hot with Finn tonight so she could replace nice and happy memories of him touching her as opposed to Karofsky.

Rachel arrived at Finn's and nervously rang the doorbell. Kurt opened the door promptly in a fabulous sweater with some tight jeans. Even at home he looks like a model form Marc Jacobs latest campaign, Rachel thought. She was taken aback when Kurt pulled her into a hug.

"God Rachel, We were so worried. I thought that we were going to lose our resident diva!" Kurt said morosely. He had been worried and felt uneasy about keeping her panic attack a secret.

"I feel so terrible for ruining the sleepover," Rachel said with her eyes downcast.

"Don't be silly, it wouldn't have been a normal Saturday night for half of them if there wasn't a drunk girl passed out by a toilet around somewhere," Kurt said, trying to make light of the situation. Rachel laughed, that was probably true.

"I am worried about you though. You have had one hell of a week. Falling over at school and having a panic attack. Maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea to talk to someone," Kurt suggested.

Rachel immediately felt backed into a corner. She hated that Kurt had witnessed her having a panic attack and most definitely didn't want anyone else to know about that.

"Kurt I really want to thank you for your concern and not telling anyone about what happened in the bathroom, but I am ok. If anything happens to change that I will let you know," Rachel said, her show face intact.

'Ok hunni. Finn is downstairs by the way."

Rachel thanked Kurt and then proceeded to climb down the stairs as quickly as her rib would allow before knocking on Finn's door. He quickly opened it, embraced her and then launched into a monologue about how she had worried him and how she was to never do that again. Rachel finally managed to calm him down before manoeuvring him over to his bed; which wasn't all that hard. They were making out and things were getting pretty hot and Rachel decided she was more than ready to go to the next step. She had ensured the lights were out so he wouldn't see her bruises and therefore avoid any questioning. She gently pulled away from Finn before broaching the topic

"Finn, I love you. Nothing made me realise that more than today and I want to take things a bit further."

Finn was nothing but smiles. He had obviously been ready for a while; what teenage boy wouldn't be. But concern did wash over his face.

"Rach, are you sure you are ready?" Finn asked cautiously.

"Yes," was all Rachel said before she proceeded to take Finn's top off. In between making out he managed to unbutton her sweater and traced his fingers along her stomach. He was getting excited and so happy he was doing this with Rachel; someone he truly loved. Rachel grabbed his hands and pulled them to her breasts. He traced around her bra gently, before deciding it was time to tackle the unclasping of her bra. Despite his lack of experience it wasn't long before he had removed it and she was topless. He traced kisses from her neck down to her breasts and she couldn't help but feel excited. She was recreating how this should have happened and promised herself to only remember this time. They continued making out for a while, Finn mostly focusing on feeling her breasts before she decided she wanted him to remove his jeans.

"Finn, I think that I am ready to go down on you," Rachel said seductively.

Finn couldn't believe what he was hearing. Last week he had a tough time getting Rachel to take her top off and now she was ready to go down on him. He wasn't complaining, he just didn't want to rush her. After much reassurance from Rachel, Finn decided not to fight it. While Rachel worried about her technique and if she was good enough she realise that she was the first girl to do this to Finn so he would hopefully not know the difference between good and bad.

It wasn't long before Finn was unable to contain his excitement and motioned Rachel to stop. He grabbed the nearest tissue and came. He laid back on his bed, while Rachel nestled into his chest.

"Was I good?" Rachel asked nervously.

Finn looked into her eyes and could see how vulnerable she was. She wanted to please him and was scared that she hadn't.

"Rach, that was amazing! You are amazing. I love you. Not because of this, but because of you being you," Finn said, hoping to alleviate any of her stress.

Rachel was happy that she and Finn had taken the next step, and he hugged her constantly for the next few hours while they spoke about their hopes and dreams for getting out of Lima, before Kurt knocked on his door to let them know dinner was ready.

The pair freaked when they heard the knock, both still being mostly unclothed. Kurt hadn't entered though, so they hadn't been completely sprung. After they were dressed, Rachel said she better be getting home and wouldn't stay for dinner. She lied and said her dad was going to pick her up and was already on his way, so instructed Finn to sit and have dinner and she would see him tomorrow. He hugged her goodbye and she quietly left. The walk home provided Rachel with more solace. She mulled over the events and felt that she and Finn were now closer than ever and felt bad that she was keeping things from him. She reminded herself that the secrets were necessary in order to protect him.

Upon arriving home, Rachel's rib was beginning to hurt. She hadn't taken any medication and didn't plan on it. She wanted to endure the pain as punishment, so she decided that a hot bath was in order. She walked up to her bedroom and ran the bath. She then stripped her bed and made it up with fresh sheets. When her room was looking in prefect order again she stripped down and got into the bath. She then played out how tomorrow would go down. Hopefully everything would go back to normal and the glee kids would all be nice to her. Suddenly the thought of seeing Karofsky at school tomorrow terrified her. She would just have to act like nothing had happened between them and hopefully he would have the decency to leave her alone.


	8. Chapter 8

Rachel got to school a little later than usual. She hadn't really wanted to come at all, but thought there was no use prolonging the inevitable embarrassment she would eventually have to face. She kept her head down and walked across the car park, not looking up once. When she had successfully reached her locker, she breathed a sigh of relief. Having made it inside, meant there was no going back and that made it easier for her, one less decision to make. She busied herself rearranging her pictures in her locker door and hardly noticed the tap at her shoulder.

"Hey Rachel"

Rachel spun around, slightly caught off guard and found herself face to face with Brittany and Santana.

"HI Brittany," Rachel said in return before politely acknowledging Santana's presences also, "Santana."

"Are you ok?" Brittany asked.

"I'm fine, sorry for ruining the night though. I don't know how I am going to live this down," Rachel muttered, trying to stop the events from flashing before her eyes again.

"You know, I could give you hell for this Berry. But I won't, I mean what girl hasn't been passed out over a toilet bowl once in her life. Trust me, you are such a goody-goody, no one would believe it anyway," Santana said, showing her concern in a slightly unusual way.

Rachel smiled at this. Knowing that Santana could have made her life at school even worse, but had decided against it meant that possibly the two girls were becoming friends.

'Thanks, I really appreciate it," Rachel said while still keeping her head low.

"Want to walk to English together?" Brittany asked.

Rachel nodded and closed her locker. Brittany could come across as a bit aloof, but she was a sweet girl and Rachel appreciated the gesture.

The three girls walked to class and Rachel was surprised at how easily she contributed to their conversation. She probably knew more about every celebrity than these girls did and that's all they seemed to talk about, so she was set.

After English the girls parted ways. Rachel was happy as she had Spanish with Finn next and hadn't seen him yet. She was a few minutes early to class so secured her usual seat and placed a book on the desk next to her to save it for Finn. She took out her Spanish text book and quickly revised over what they would be covering in class that day. She didn't want Mr Schue catching her out in any way. From here on out she had to be prepared for classes and give no one any reason to worry. She liked that the Glee kids had started to like her a bit and didn't want them thinking she was trying to get attention or be a diva by drawing any unnecessary attention to herself. It wasn't long before kids started piling into the room. Rachel put her book down and smiled as she saw Finn. He walked over to her and bent down to kiss her.

"Hey Rach," Finn said sweetly.

"Hey," Rachel replied and quickly embraced him before Mr Schue walked in.

Mr Schue addressed the class and began writing on the board so most of the kids took the time to have a quick catch up gossip session with their friends.

"I still can't believe how amazing last night was," Finn said cheekily. Rachel blushed, she was glad that she had stepped things up with Finn but still wasn't ready to go all the way and hoped Finn wouldn't be expecting that any time soon.

"I enjoyed it too," Rachel said, genuinely pleased.

"Did you get home ok?" Finn asked, a little worried that her dad might have grounded her or something over what had happened on Saturday night.

"Yes, dad and I ended up going out for dinner," Rachel lied, hoping Finn wouldn't pick up on this by the slight inflection in her tone.

"He wasn't mad then?" Finn questioned.

Rachel was actually upset that her dad still hadn't called her and that her Daddy really hadn't been that mad, but thought a regular parent would probably be pissed so decided to ad live it a bit.

"Oh he was furious, but I've never really done anything bad before, so I used my powers of persuasion to calm him down. Although he wants me home straight after all my lessons this week, so we will have to make the most of seeing each other in school," Rachel cursed herself as the words left her mouth. She couldn't believe she was grounding herself! She could have been hanging out with Finn in her spare time and now she was going to be doing nothing at home alone!

"Oh that sucks," Finn said, right before Mr Schue turned around and started randomly selecting students to answer the questions on the board in Spanish.

After Spanish Finn took Rachel's hand and walked her to her locker. They didn't have any more classes together for the rest of the day and he wanted to be with her for as long as he could. He smiled when she opened her locker to reveal a picture of them taken in her bedroom. They both looked so happy. She was wearing a pink gingham dress and looked so cute. It was taken about three months ago and he suddenly became taken aback when he looked at the Rachel standing in front of him compare to the Rachel in that picture. She was skinnier now, he hadn't really noticed it before, but her face was so cheery and bright in the photo and the Rachel in front of him looked a bit gaunt and at least 7 pounds skinnier. Finn became fidgety. God every girl he knew was weird about their weight, even his mum. He made it a point never to engage in any conversation about that type of thing because he always ended up saying the wrong thing. But Rachel was happy wasn't she? She had been happy in Spanish and on Sunday night and nearly every time he saw her she was always smiling at him. He decided to broach the subject but cautiously.

"Hey Rach, have you gotten taller?" Finn thought that maybe if she had gotten taller she would have gotten skinnier.

"I wish," Rachel laughed.

"Oh it's just you seem like you have lost weight since that photo," Finn said slightly confused.

"I guess I'm just losing some of my baby weight," Rachel said as nonchalantly as possible. God she remembered that she hadn't eaten breakfast this morning and she hadn't brought lunch either. It wasn't exactly like she was losing weight on purpose; it just felt nice controlling something. She couldn't believe that Finn was actually bringing this up with her right now. She decided that she would have to avoid him at lunch today.

"Oh God Finn, I forgot to tell you that I am helping Mr Simons out with lunch time tutoring today," Rachel decided that there was no way this lie would be uncovered as nobody ever helped out at lunch time tutoring except her.

"Oh that's ok Rach," Finn said trying to sound upbeat, but was genuinely a little upset he wouldn't be seeing her until Glee that afternoon. He grabbed her tiny hand within his again and waited while she closed up her locker before escorting her to her next class.

Rachel sighed, relieved that another potential issue had been avoided. When they arrived to her next class she didn't want to let go of Finn's hand.

"I love you Finn," Rachel said, more confirming the fact that her and Finn were real and the happiness she was feeling was real too.

"I love you too Rach. I always will," Finn said.

Karofsky was walking past and was unhappy with what he was seeing. God the hobbit and Frankenteen were still in love. It infuriated him to see them happy. He hated Rachel for no other reason that she was someone who had dreams bigger than this school and he wanted to try and crush the hope out of her.

"You too are sick. Such a weird couple. I bet your babies would be deformed," Karofsky said while high fiving one of his football buddies.

Rachel and Finn looked over to see Karofsky and Azimo. RAchel immediately looked to the floor and pretended that she was somewhere else. She thought that if people continued to tease them for being together it might wear away at her and Finn. SHe didn't want him to have to deal with the teasing because of her, it wasn't fair.

"Lay of Karofsky," Finn yelled. He was angry that Karofsky though he could get away with saying that sort of stuff.

"What are you going to do man?" Karofsky asked.

Finn thought about that. There wasn't much he could do. He would defend Rachel to the death but he wasn't going to continue engaging with this loser.

"You know what man, you're not worth it. Rachel and I are happy and she is the best thing that ever happened to me, so nothing you say about us even matters," Finn said, happy with his reply.

In that moment Rachel fell a little more in love with Finn. He ushered her into her class, before walking to his, all the while leaving Karofsky looking dumbfounded in the hallway. Rachel just hoped that Karofsky would lay off now and find something else to do with his time than harass her.

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**AN: thanks for the reviews and sorry this chapter isn't as long as the others. I just finished exams so have been really busy. Promise that it will start getting more heavy in the next few chapters though and possibly thinking that I may go towards having some Puckleberry action - strickly Puckleberry friendship though. Hope you all like this chapter and reviews are always appreciated as are your thought on story development. :)**


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